Ansu\ First, Certainly you are most absurd in pleading and pte- tending your impotence against your duty ; for you do think you have a power to come to Christ, else how do you quiet j^our consci- ence with promises and resolves of conversion hereafter ? Secondly, Though it be true, that no saving act can be done without the con- currence of special grace ; yet this is as true, that thy inability to do w hat is above thy power, doth not excuse thee from doing what is in thy power to do. Canst thou not forbear, at least, many external acts of sin? And canst thou not perform, at least, the external acts of duty ? Oh ! if thou canst not come to Christ, yet, as the blind man, lie in the way of Christ : do what thou canst do, and confess and bewail thy impotency, that thou canst do no more. Canst thou not take thy soul aside in secret, and thus bemoan it ; my poor soul ! what wilt thou do? O what will become of thee, thou art christless, cove- nantless, hopeless, and, which is most sad, senseless and bov.elless? oh ! thou canst not bear the infinite wrath of the eternal God, whose Almighty power will be set on work to torment such as thou art ; and yet thou takest no course to prevent it ! Thou seest the busy diligence of all others, and how the kingdom of heaven suffers vio- lence by them : and art not thou as deeply engaged to look to thy own happiness as any in the world ? Will hell be more tolerable to thee than others ? O what a composition of stupidity and sloth art thou : Thou livest after such a rate, as if there were neither fire in hell to torment thee, nor glory in heaven to reward thee. If God and Christ, heaven and hell, were but dreams and fables, thou couldst not be less affected with them. Ah, my soul ! my soul ! my preci- ous soul ! Is it easy to perish ? Wilt thou die as a fool dieth ? O that men would but do this if they can do no more !
And now, soul, you see what death that is you have made so light of; and what is the only way that we poor sons of death have to escape its sting. You have here seen the vanity of all your pleas and pretences against conversion, and the vray to Christ prepared and cast up for you. Now sirs, I beg you, in the name of God that made you, and as if I made this request upon my bended knees to you, that you will now, without any more delays, yield yourselves to the Lord. Soul, I beseech thee, haste thee into thy chamber, shut thy door, and bespeak the Lord after some such manner as this before thou darcst to launch out into the deeps again.
O dreadful and glorious Majesty ! thou hast bowels of mercy, as well as beams of glory : I have heard the sounding of these bowels for me this day. Lord, I have now heard a representation of the grim and ghastly face of death : ah, I have now seen it as the king of terrors, as the door of eternity, as the parting point where sin- ners take their eternal farewell of all their delights : I have seen this black prince mounted on his pale horse, and hell following him : I have been convinced this day, that if he should come and fetch away my soul in that condition it is, hell would follow hijn indeed.
THE seaman'^s catechism. 841
Lord, I have now heard of the Prince of Hfe also, in whose bleeding side death hath left and lost its envenomed sting ; so that though it may kill, yet it cannot hurt any of his members. To this glorious Redeemer I have now been invited ; all my pretences against him have been confuted, and my soul, in his name, assured of welcome, if I come unto him, and cast myself upon him. And now. Lord, I come, I come, upon thy call and invitation ; I am unfeignedly wil- ling to avouch thee this day to be my God, and to take thee for my portion. Lord Jesus ! I come unto thee ; thy clay, thy creature moves towards the Fountain of pity : look hitherto, behold a spec- tacle of misery. Bowels of mercy, hear ! behold my naked soul, not a rag of righteousness to cover it ; behold my starving soul, not a bit of bread for it to eat : ah ! it has fed upon wind and vanity hither- to. Behold my v/ounded soul bleeding at thy foot ; every part, head and heart, will and affections, all wounded by sin. O thou compas- sionate Samaritan ! turn aside, and pour thy sovereign blood into these bleeding wounds, which, like so many opened mouths, plead for pity. Behold a returning, submitting rebel, willing to lay down the weapons of unrighteousness, and to come upon the knee for a pardon. Oh, I am weary of the service of sin, I can endure it no longer ! Lord Je- sus, thou wast anointed to preach glad tidings to the meek, and to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound ; come now, and knock off those fetters of un- belief: O set my soul at liberty that it may praise thee ! For so many years Satan hath cruelly tyrannized over me. O that this might be the acceptable year of the Lord, and the day of the salvation of my God ! Lord, thou wast lifted up to draw men unto thee ; and indeed thou art a drawing Saviour, a lovely Jesus ! I have hitherto slighted thee, but it was because I did not know thee : mine eyes have been held by unbelief, when thou wast opened in the gospel ; but now I see thee as the chiefest of ten thousands. Thou art the glory of heaven, the glory of earth, the glory of Sion ; and, oh I that thou wouldst be the glory of my soul ! I confess I am not worthy thou shouldst look upon me ; I may much rather expect to be trampled under the feet of justice, than to be embraced in thine arms of mer- cy : and that thou shouldst rather shed my polluted blood, than sprinkle thine own upon me. But, Lord, what profit is there in ray blood ? Wilt thou pursue a dried leaf; Shall it ever be said that the merciful King of heaven hanged up a poor soul that put the rope about his own neck, and so came self-condemningly to him for mer- cy ! O, my Lord, I am willing to submit to any terms^ be they never so hard and ungrateful to the fiesh : I am sure whatever 1 shall suffer m thy service cannot be like to what I have suffered, or am like to suffer by sin ; henceforth be thou my Lord and Master ; thy service is perfect freedom ; be thou my priest and prophet, my wisdom and righteousness. I resign up myself unto thee ; my poor soul with all its faculties, my body with all its members, to be living instruments
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of thy glory. Let lioliness to the Loi'd be now written upon them all, let my tongue henceforth plead for thee, my hands be lifted up unto thy testimonies, my feet walk in thy ways: O let all my affec- tions, as willing servants, wait upon thee, and be active for thee. Whatever I am, let me be for thee ; whatever I have, let it be thine ; whatever I can do, let me do for thee ; whatever I can suf- fer, let me suffer for thee. O that I might say, before I go hence, my beloved is mine, and I am his ! O that Avhat I have begged on earth might be ratified in heaven ! my spirit within me, saith, Amen. Lord Jesus, say thou. Amen.