Thou art often crying out, Lord I why is it thus.? Why go I mourning all the day, having sorrow in my heart ? Thus long have I been exercised with hardness of heart, and to this day have not ob- tained a broken heart. Many years have I been praying and striv- ing against vain thoughts, yet am still infested and perplexed with them. O when shall I get a better heart ! I have been in travail, and brought forth but wind ; I have obtained no deliverance, nei- ther have the corruptions of my heart fallen. I have brought this heart many times to prayers, sermons and sacraments, expecting and hoping for a cure from them, and still my sore runneth, andceasethnot.
Pensive soul ! Let this comfort thee ; thy God designs thy bene- fit, even by these occasions of thy sad complaints. For (1.) Hereby he would let thee see what thy heart by nature is and was, and there- in take notice how much thou art beholden to free g-race. He leaves thee under these exercises of spirit, that thou mayest lie, as with thy face upon the ground, admiring that ever the Lord of glory should take so vile a creature into his bosom. Thy base heart, if it be good for nothing else, yet serves to commend and set off the unsearchable riches of free grace. (2.) This serves to beat thee off continually from resting, yea, or but glancing upon thine own righteousness or excellency. The corruption of thy heart, working in all thy duties, makes thee sensible to feel that the bed is too short, and the cover- ing too narrow. Were it not for those reflections thou hast after duties, upon the dulness and distractions of thine heart in them ; how apt wouldst thou be to fall in love with, and admire thine own performances and enlargements ? For if notwithstanding these, thou hast much to do with the pride of thy heart, how much more ; if such humbling and self-abasing considerations were wanting. And, lastly, this tends to make thee the more compassionate and tender towards others : Perhaps thou wouldst have little pity for the dis- tresses and soul-troubles of others, if thou hadst less experience of thine own.
3 Comfort. To conclude ; God will shortly put a blessed end to all these troubles^ cares and •patchings.
The time is coming, when thy heart shall be as thou wouldst have it ; when thou shalt be discharged of all these cares, fears, and sor- rows, and never cry out, O my hard, mv proud, my vain, my earth- ly heart any more ! When all darkness shall be vanished from thine understanding ; and thou shalt clearly discover all truths in God> that crystal ocean of truth : When all vanity shall be purged perfect-
THE EPISTLE TO THE READER. 509
ly out of thy thoughts, and they be everlastingly, ravishingly, and delightfully entertained and exercised upon that supreme goodness^ and infinite excellency of God, from whom they shall never start any more like a broken bow. And as for thy pride, passion, earthliness, and all other the matters of thy complaint and trouble, it shall be said of them, as of the Egyptians to Israel, " Stand still, and see the " salvation of God." These corruptions thou seest to day, hence- forth thou shalt see them no more for ever ! when thou shalt lay down thy weapons of prayers, tears, and groans, and put on the armour of light, not to fight, but triumph in.
Lord ! when shall this blessed day come ? How long ! how long ! holy and true.'' My soul waiteth for thee ! Come, my Beloved ! and be thou like a roe, or a young hart upon the mountains of Bether. Amen.
TOUCHSTONE OF SINCERITY:
THE SIGNS OF GRACE, AND SYMPTOMS OF HYPOCRISY.
Opened in a practical Treatise upon Revelation iii. 17, 18.
The Epistle to the Reader. Reader^
-AlMONG the difficulties and severities of true rehgion, the faith- ful searching, and diligent keeping of our hearts are found in the first and highest rank of difficulties : These two take up the main work of a Christian betwixt them, Hie labor^ hoc opus est. I had hopes that these essays for the searching of the hearty might much sooner have followed my former for keeping the heart.* But provi- dence hath reserved it for the fittest season.
It comes to thy hand, Reader, in a day of straits and fears, a dark and gloomy season ; when the nations about us are made drunk with their own blood, and filled with the wine of astonishment ? in a day when the cup is ready to pass unto us, and a storm seems to be rising in the fears of many, and threatening the protestant interest in these reformed nations. Some men very considerable for piety and learn-
510 THE EWSTLE TO THE REAUETT.
ing from that scripture, Rev. xiii. 3. " The deadly wound,'* (viz. That given the beast by the reformation) was healedy have concluded, that popery will once more over-run the reformed na^ lions : And one of great renown in all the churches of Christ, fore- telling this furious, but short storm, comforts the people of God Tvith this, That it is like to fall heaviest upon the worshippers in the outward courts namely the formal professors of the times.
O how much is every man now concerned to have his estate and condition well cleared, and to give all diligence to make his calling and election sure !
It should both amaze and grieve a pious mind, to see how some ingenious persons can sit with unwearied patience and pleasure, rack- ing their brains upon some dry school problem, or some nice mathema- tical jyo'mt ; whilst no reasons or persuasions can prevail with them to spend one serious hour in the search and study of their own hearts !
It was the saying of the great Cicero, Lihenter omnibus omnes opes concesserim, uf mihi liceat, vi nulla intcrpellante, isto rtiodo Uteris vi~ vere: I would give all the wealth in the world that I might wholly live in my studies, and have nothing to hinder me. What a brave offer had that been, if heaven, and the clearing of a title to it, had been the subject-matter of those studies! Cred^ mihi, extingui dulce esset^ tnathematicarumartium studio, saiih another; i. e. Believe me, it were a sweet death to die in the study of the matltematical arts : And I should be apt to believe it too, did I not know that eternal judgment immediately follows death ; and that they who stand at the door of eternity have higher matters to mind than mathematical niceties. To discern the harmonies and proportions in nature is pleasant ; but, to discern the harmony and proportion of the signs of grace laid down in the word, with the works of grace wrought in our soids, is a far more pleasant and necessary employment : and, to be extinguished in such a work as this, \vere a lovely death indeed : " Blessed is that '^ 5>ervant, whom his Lord, when he cometh, shall find so doing!"