VeR. 25.] SERMONS UPON HEBREWS XL 457
Therefore how is it upon the trial ? Were rou ever acquaiuted with self-denial in this case ? or do you decline duty to avoid a danger ? or do evil to get a little profit, and so yield upon that occasion ? Are not you discouraged in the ways of God, or from the ways of God, because of inconveniences you have cheapened ? but you will not go through with the price, you will not buy. Are you not turned out of the way because of reproach, and shame, and hatred of friends ? and have you not often withdrawn from God, when the devil makes a proffer to you ? Can you venture upon duty in the face of danger, and say, ' If I perish, I perish,' as Esther? How is it upon a trial? And if this be not sensible enough to give you farther light into your own heart, then let me ask you concern iug some concomitant disposi- tions that will go along with this disposition.
(1.) If you be of such a temper as to choose the greatest affliction rather than the least sin, then it will be seen by this which is your greatest grief, t^in or misery? what troubles you most, that you suffer loss in the world, or that you have displeased God ? what pains and grieves you most, sin or affliction ? Surely godly sorrow should come behind no sorrow : Zech. xii. 10, ' They sliall look up to him whom they have pierced, and they shall mourn for him as one mourneth for his only son, and shall be in bitterness for him, as one is in bitterness for his first-born.' Therefore how is it with you ? Many are com- plaining of poverty, of the toothache, the headache, and never com- plain of sin, and of the body of death. What puts you upon most bitter complaints? To be carnal is worse than to be miserable. To wallow in ease and pleasure is a more cursed estate than to suffer nakedness, cold, hunger, and thirst. I confess that sensitive sorrow is more violent in the expressions of it ; as sorrow for the loss of a child or any outward comfort may be more violent in outward ex- pressions, because nature and grace run in one channel ; as the flood was mightily increased when the windows of heaven were opened from above, and the fountains of the great deep were broken up from below. A worldly loss may cause a more lively stirring of grief ; but for a cordial hatred, real resistance, and deep trouble of heart, that will be more about sin and corruptions than about worldly losses. Look, as in another aff'ectioa we laugh more at a trifle than we do when we receive solid benefit, the act of joy is more lively; so here, grief may be more sensibly stirred upon an outward loss ; but serious and deep trouble of heart will be about corruption. Drawing of a tooth is more painful, and extorts greater roaring from us, than the decays of a con- sumption that are dangerous and deadly ; yet this afflicts more in- wardly, and begets a more deep, constant, lasting grief; so the child- ren of God, above all evils they will bewail the evil of sin. If you be of such a temper to choose the greatest affliction rather than the least sin, you will be troubled more for sin than for affliction, and grieve because you can mourn no more for sin.
2. When you are afflicted, what do you desire most, to have afflic- tion sanctified or removed ? You will find it by your behaviour in such an estate : if you murmur under the affliction, and would fain have it gone, and be rid of the troublesome physic, but care not whether the affliction hath its due effect upon thee yea or no, then
458 SERMONS UPON HEBREWS XI, [SeR. LX.
surely you hate tlie affliction more than the sin. Job was censured for this: Job xxxvi. 21, 'Take heed, re,s:;ard not iniquity, for this hast thou chosen rather than affliction.' When men are troubled more with what is painful and a damage to their interest, and smart to sense and feeling, than they are for what is offensive and contrary to God, and do not look to the working out of sin by their afflictions, they hate the affliction more than the sin. The saints do not conceive prayers out of interest, but out of the new nature. To be freed from the trouble and affliction is a common mercy, but to have the affliction sanctified is a special mercy ; therefore they that have gracious hearts aim at this, to have it sanctified and improved. Carnal men may be without affliction, but they cannot have the experience of grace. Therefore mere deliverance from affliction is no sign of special love ; a child of God cannot be content with that, he would not only be delivered from the grave, but 'be loved from the grave,' as Hezekiah saith, Isa. xxxviii. 17. Paul at first was all to have the thorn in the flesh gone. The expression seems to import that it was some torture of the stone or gout, or racking pain in the body, and he would have it removed ; but God tells him, ' My grace is sufficient for thee, for my strength is made perfect in weakness.' What then ? ' Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me,' 2 Cor. xii. 7-9. His heart seems to be contented with the experiences of grace, and he was glad of this trouble which had occasioned such sweet experience of God. So 2 Tim. iv. 17, 18, ' I was delivered out of the mouth of the lion,' he hath delivered me, and taken me out of affliction. ' And the Lord shall deliver me from every evil work, and he will preserve me to his heavenly kingdom.' Paul pitcheth chiefly upon that, he is more solicitous in trouble to be freed from sin than from trouble. Salvation is God's great work in us, to be kept safe to the heavenly kingdom, and to be fitted for heaven, and therefore our greatest design should be for that ; so the main care be cared for, we need not care what becomes of us here. In general, it is a mark of grace if we can with patience bear the evil of punish- ment that we may escape the evil of sin, which of all evils is the worst.