7. Because otherwise a man can be nothing in religion, neither do nor suffer ; and therefore we must resolve either to deny ourselves or to deny Christ. Before we go out of the world, we shall be put upon the trial. Peter denied his master, because he could not deny himself. All duties in religion put us upon self-denial — private duties upon the denial of lusts, and public upon the denial of interests ; therefore we read of ' denying ungodliness and worldly lusts,' Titus ii. 12. In private duties : whenever you go to pray, private duties are contrary to the inclinations and dispositions of the heart, which are for ease and pleasure, and the gratifications of the flesh. If thou hast no self-denial, thou wilt never bring thy heart to God in them. Then in public duties we must look for opposition. Advancers of public good are usually exposed to public hatred, they are sure to be spoken against ; when
192 A TREATISE OF SELF-DENIAL. [BoOK I.
the devil cannot prevail with instruments to slacken the work of God, then he stirs up the world afi;ainst it. That must be a complete action wherein malice cannot find fault. It is true, we are not always exposed to persecution, but always to censure. Many that have neither heart nor hands to do good, yet have tongues to censure those that do it, magistrates and ministers. Therefore we must look for trouble, if not from malice, yet from envy. Who can stand before envy ? If perse- cutors be under restraint, yet carnal professors will be apt to blemish what is not done by themselves. Therefore whosoever would be a disciple to God and Christ, this is his first lesson ; this is the A B C of religion. We shall never digest the inconveniences of a spiritual life till we resolve upon it. We must make over our interests in our lives, and whatever is dear to us, reckon the charges, Luke xiv. 26. A builder spends cheerfully as long as his charges are within his allowance ; but when that is exceeded, and he goes beyond what he hath reckoned upon, then every penny is disbursed with grudging. Most resolve upon little or no trouble in religion, and from thence it comes to pass that when they are crossed, they pi'ove faint-hearted. Therefore put your lite in your hand, and resolve to follow Christ wheresoever he goeth.
8. Every one must deny himself, because it is a special part of faith. Faith looks upon God's mercy in Christ, not only as true, but as good ; better than life, and better than all the contentments of it, else it is not faith: 1 Tim. i. 15, ' This is a faithful saying, and worthy of all accep- tation.' It doth not only look upon it as a wise and faithful saying, but as a thing of choice. There is not only assent to what is true, but there is consent and choice. Faith is an inclination of the soul to true worth, and therefore, with a resting upon the mercies of Christ there is a renouncing of interest ; Mat. xiii. 46, the merchant that found the rich pearl ' went and sold all to buy it' This is faith, to come and traffic with God for his mercy in Christ, to part with all, whatever is pleasant and profitable in the world, rather than be deprived of his grace : Luke xiv. 27-29, ' He that hates not his father and mother, yea, and his own life, cannot be my disciple;' and then our Lord brings the similitude of a man that goes about to build, and sits him down and counts the chaige. In faith there is a sitting down and account- ing the charges, or considering what it is to take Christ. The comforts of Christianity we prize much, but they are only necessary to be pro- pounded in case of distress of conscience. But he that desires to be a christian indeed is seriously to cast up his reckoning, what is required athishands, thoroughly to examine whether he be willing to forego such liopes and contentments as are incompatible with the life he seeketh, or to endure all crosses and calamities wherewith he may be encum- bered. The builder that goes hand over head to work, lays the founda- tion of his disgrace in the loss of his cost. Men labour to fortify their actual persuasion of the mercies of Christ before the carnal life be renounced. It is a mistake to look to faith first, and the settling our particular assurance, as if that were the difficultest thing in religion. The great difficulty lies in self-denial. As Christ put the young man in Mat. xix. 26, upon the trial. Canst thou leave all, and follow me ? so we are to put ourselves upon the trial, otherwise our application to God's mercy, and settling our particular persuasion, will be but a rash
Book I.] a treatise of self-denial. 193
confidence. Every one hath some tender parts, and usually at first conviction our tender parts are touched. When God begins to work upon the heart, we should say, Soul, thou hast busied thyself in a wrong way, there is one thing necessary : come out of that way, or thou shalt never be happy. Forsake thy father's house : we are apt to stick at this, we are not able to renounce all for him. As when God called Abraham, he called him from his father's house ; so when we are called to God, we are called from something pleasant and profitable to self.