3. Labour after a sense of grace. Grace and a sense of grace differ, for the spiritual acts of the soul are not so liable to feeling as the acts of the body. AYhen I awake, I know I am so ; but internal sense differeth
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from outward. A man may be in a state of grace, yet not always know it ; as John xiv. 4, 5, ' Whither I go ye know, and the way ye know. Thomas saith unto him, Lord, we know not whither thou goest> and how can we know the way ? ' A direct contradiction. Sciehant isti sed se scire nesciehant, saitli Austin — The apostles knew the way, but did not know they knew it. We need an interpreter to show us our righteousness. Grace is so weak, and there is such a mixture of sin, and men so seldom come to an audit, that conscience is extremely puzzled to know whether there be grace or no. Our uncertainty in this kind may be reduced to these two heads — want of observance, and want of judgment, inadvertency and injudiciousness. We do not take notice of the acts of grace through non-observance, and because of the mixture of weakness, conscience cannot judge of the regulation of our actions. We neglect observation, and therefore are to seek of consola- tion. You know there are two questions go upon this debate — whether I have done such a thing or no ? then whether I have done it as I ought to do it ? It concerns first the being of the action, and then the regularity of it, congruousness of it with the rule. Therefore, if we would get a sense of grace, we must be watchful to observe what is .done, and judicious to see whether it carry proportion with the rule. Now, ' by use our senses will be exercised to discern both good and evil,' Heb. v. 14. To get a sense of grace, the soul must be heedful and cautious. By long and much acquaintance with God and the work of holiness we may be able to make a judgment upon our own actions. How shall we keep the soul in a constant observation, that we may be more at home, and constantly take notice of the state of the heart ? Here these rules will be of use.
1. As doubts arise get them satisfied. These are hints from God, that you should study your hearts more. Smothering of doubts is dangerous ; it breeds atheism and hypocrisy; therefore, when they arise, never dismiss them without an answer and clear satisfaction ; do not suspend it out of self-love and carnal fear. As when we see the smoke a-coming, we keep blowing to get it into a flame, so when the Spirit begins to set the heart on lire, keep blowing. Doubts arise, but bring them to a head. God offereth many a fair occasion to men to study their own heart, how it is with them ; if they neglect it, all runs to confusion and uncertainty. Well, having your hearts at an advantage, get the case cleared one way or other.
2. As sins are committed get them pardoned ; 1 John ii. 1, ' If any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.' Kun to your advocate ; never leave until you have gotten a copy of your discharge, and God gives you assurance of your pardon by his Spirit in the court of your consciences. This will put you upon often recourse to Christ, which is the sure way to get comfort ; but negligence in the spiritual life, and swallowing sins without remorse, breeds security. Look, as a fountam, when it is muddied, never leaves till it work itself clear again, so when you have fallen foul, and con- science smites, never leave until God hath given you the pardon of that sin : Jer. viii. 4, ' Shall they fall, and not arise ? ' Take heed of lying still or of negligence. If you be a constant observer of corruptions, and cease not until by Christ's death you get a pardon, all things will not be so dark, doubtful, and litigious.
332 SERMONS UPON HEBREWS VI. 18.
3. Eevise^ acts of faith as soon as they are exerted and put forth. When faith is renewed by the word, in prayer, or in meditation, examine it. Lusts and graces are best discovered whilst they are stirring. A man surprised in an act of sin is most sensible of it : 'A thief is ashamed when he is found,' Jer. ii. 26. So to surprise the soul in an act of grace, as when sweet thoughts and hopes of God's grace and mercy are stirred up, say, Is not this faith ? Carnal principles, that otherwise lie hid, are best discovered in their operation ; as when a man is praying or preaching out of vainglory, if his heart return upon him, and take him tardy, his shame is more increased.
4. Get experiences confirmed as soon as they are exhibited. A christian that walks in darkness and is uncertain of his state had need be watchful, and wait upon God in the word and in prayer, and observe providences for some glimpses of his love. Look, as Benhadad's servants, 1 Kings XX. 33, watched for the word brother, so should you watch what tokens of love and favour will pass out, and what experiences and quick- enings you have. In the word : Ps. cxix. 93, 'I will never forget thy precepts, for with them thou hast quickened me.' When you find fresh excitations of grace come in upon the soul, oh ! I shall never forget such a duty ; there God met me and quickened me. Oh ! improve it. So in the supper : Cant. i. 3, ' Because of the savour of thy good oint- ment, thy name is an ointment poured forth, therefore the virgins love thee.' When at any time you have been conversing with God, and the Lord hath stirred up holy joy, oh ! remember it. So for comfort in affliction : Eom. v. 3, 4, ' We glory in tribulation also, knowing that tribulation worketh patience, and patience experience, and experience hope.' When you have had any experience of God in trouble, improve it to a settled hope. Should I not believe in him, and wait upon him for comfort, that hath been so gracious to me ? When experiences and feelings pass away without any observation, we lose a great deal of comfort.