First, Let us speak of the first act, the terminus a quo, turning from sin. Supposing the judgment enlightened and the heart made tender by grace, the work doth mainly discover itself in the affections of fear, shame, grief, and indignation. True humiliation is begun in fear, con- tinued in shame, carried on by sorrow, and endeth in indignation. And so sin is renounced, and the power of it broken. And indeed, when- ever we renew our repentance upon special occasions, these are the affec- tions that are to be exercised. They all have a proper ground and consideration to set them at work. (1.) Fear leadeth the rank. That tremble th at the wrath of God and judgment to come ; an accusing conscience telling us that we are in a state of damnation. (2.) Shame
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looketh upon sin not only as hurtful but filthy and brutish. It is <^o/3o9 BiKalo -^vyov, a fear of just reproach for the filthiness and folly of sin. (3.) Sorrow looks upon God's goodness and sin's unkindness, laraenting that ever we should lose the favour of such a God as this is, who hath, made us, and kept us, and gave his Son to die for mankind ; now that we should forfeit his favour ! (4.) Indignation is stirred up by the unseemliness and disproportion of sin to the nature of man, much more to grace infused, or that interest we have or would have by Christ. In short, fear looketh upon sin as damning, shame as defiling, sorrow as offensive to God ; indignation is misbecoming our present resolutions, hopes, and interests. The guilt of sin causeth fear ; the stain, shame ; the unkindness, sorrow ; the unsuitableness, indignation. By this means did we come to be divorced from sin, and by these means it is daily weakened.
1. The first awakening of the soul is by the sense of the wrath of God, and everlasting woe denounced on impenitent sinners. You have done that which in its own nature deserveth you should suffer eternal torments, and be separated from the Lord, and be cast forth with the devil and his aogels. And then the sinner, being under a fear of being condemned, crietli out, Oh ! what shall I do to flee from the wrath to come ! I am undone and lost unless God help me. I say here the work beginneth ; punishment is soonest felt, and the first notion that we have of sin is the guilt of it, which causeth fears and terrors with respect to the wrath that is to ensue. So it is said of those converts, Acts ii. 37, ' That they were pricked at their hearts ; ' they were troubled about their condition. It requireth a quicker and more tender sense to be sensible of the folly and filthiness of sin. A man that is covered with noisome boils and sores, the first thing that affecteth him is the pain, though he also abhorreth the sight and smell of them. First we tremble at the thought of God's judgments, before we are ashamed of sin or grieve for it. In renewing our repentance this is an ingredient. It is not against the liberty of the gospel to make use of threatenings ; we are sluggish, and need all kind of helps.
2. There is shame and self-loathing, which ariseth from an appre- hension of the odiousness of sin : Ezek. vi. 9, ' They shall loathe them- selves for the evils which they have committed in all their abomina- tions ; ' Job xlii. 6, ' I abhor myself, and repent in dust and ashes.' So Ezra ix. 6, ' 0 my God ! I am ashamed, and blush to lift up my face to thee, my God.' They are ashamed to look God in the face, they have dealt so unworthily with him. This is to hate sin as sin, when a man is not only afraid of it, but ashamed of it, as it is against the revealed will of God ; not only as it bringeth misery, but as it crosses God's will ; not only for the evil after sin, but the evil in sin ; that you have polluted your souls, defiled your natures, defaced the image of God, become as a beast before him : Ps. Ixxiii. 22, ' So foolish was I, and ignorant ; I was as a beast before thee.' Oh ! what a fool I was to turn my back upon God ; to imagine that any good could come of sin, which God hateth, and to practise a thing so unbefitting the reasonable nature !
3. Sorrow and lamentation to the Lord, which ariseth from a thought of the Lord's goodness and sin's unkindness : Zech. xii. 10, ' They shall look upon me whom they have pierced, and they shall mourn for him ; '
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Luke vii. 47, she wept much because ' she loved much.' Sin will aflfect the heart most when the wrong done to God is considered, who never showed any backwardness to our good, but who gave his Son to die for us. He made us at first, and how soon can he take from us that which he hath given us. He hath obliged us with a multitude of benefits : Isa. i. 3, ' I have nourished and brought up children, and they have rebelled against me ; ' Kom. ii. 4, ' Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and long-suffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance ? ' And shall we use all these as weapons of unrighteousness ! food, raiment, peace, plenty ? Ah ! but his Christ above all ! Oh ! never any sinned as I have done. The devdl sinned, but Christ never died for him, as he did for me. Judas sinned, but he was never pardoned, as I have been. Achan sinned, but he had not that light and knowledge of the gospel that I have had ; he did not live under such means as I have enjoyed. We content ourselves with a hasty sigh. Oh ! but it is a deep sorrow that is required, and an active pungent grief, ' rending the heart,' Joel ii. 13 ; ' Afflicting the soul,' Lev. xvi. 29 ; Mat. xxvi. 75, ' Peter wept bitterly.' When we are touched with a sense of our unkindness to God, we shall mourn.