2. Obedience ; that is showed in many things.
[1.] In studying to please rather than to be pleased ; for the apostle telleth us that ' she that is married careth for the things of this world, that she may please her husband,' 1 Cor. vii. 34 ; that is, counts it part of her calling to take her part and care of domestical iiffairs, that she may be pleasing and acceptable to her husband.
[2.] By fulfilling his commands in all things lawful, and not con- trary to her duty to God : Titus ii. 5, ' Let wives be obedient to their own husbands.' And this not with a grudging, discontented sullenness ; as Zipporah, in circumcising her son, cast the foreskin at Moses' feet, saying, ' Surely a bloody husband art thou to me,' Exod. iv. 25, by way of angry upbraiding him, that such severity must be exercised on her son ; at least that is the meaning our translation seemeth to hold forth. But with readiness and willingness, as a duty to be performed as unto God, who will be served not by constraint, but with a ready mind ; and therefore they must obey not out of necessity, but conscionably, and with all cheerfulness. Instances of this we have in holy women who trusted in God ; as Sarah followed Abraham when he went into a
440 SERMONS UPON EPHESIANS V. [SeR. XXVII.
strange country, and was partaker with him of the blessings there, Gen, xii. 5 ; and in entertaining the angels, Gen. xviii. 6. When Abraham said unto Sarah, ' Make ready quickly three measures of fine meal, and knead it quickly, and make cakes upon the hearth ' ; we find no disputing and gainsaying of these commands, but a ready obedience is presupposed, which all good women should imitate.
[3.] By submitting her will to her husband's content, and her de- sires to his approbation and allowance: Gen. iii. 16, ' Thy desire shall be to thy husband,' that is, subject to him, 'and he shall bear rule over thee.' This is one clause in the woman's censure after the trans- gression ; and we can neither make God's laws straiter nor larger than they are, and therefore the woman must be content with the duty- God hath imposed on her.
[4.] In patience under his rebukes. So the apostle : 1 Tim. ii. 12, ' But I suffer not a woman to teach, and to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.' The apostle givetli directions there con- cerning the woman's public and domestical carriage. As to her public carriage, ' I suffer her not to speak in the church,' ovSe avOevrelv apSp6<f, that is the word ; not to carry it as if her will were authentic, or the rule of the family, but, in opposition to both, she is to be ' in silence ; ' as not to teach in the church, so at home to be obedient without re^ plying or countermanding. And that is the reason why a meek and quiet spirit is so much commended as an ornament of a gracious Avoman : 1 Peter iii. 4, ' The ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which in the sight of God is of great price.' Meekness and quietness is chiefly exercised in bridling our passions, when anything falleth out cross and contrary to our desires and expectations, and we eschew all needless contradiction and expressions of malcontentedness. Now this is not only gaining upon the husband, but is very acceptable to God, who delighteth in the graces he hath wrought in his own people. But now, on the contrary, a humorous moroseness and impatiency is very dis- pleasing unto God and man, and destructive of family society : Prov. xiii. 19, *A contentious wife is a continual dropping.' As the coming in of the rain in a ruinous house doth founder it, and rot it more and more, and nothing can be preserved from hurt by reason of it, so there is no safety nor comfort in cohabitation with those of that temper. So again, Prov. xxvii. 15, 16, * A continual dropping in a rainy day, and a contentious woman, are alike. Whosoever hitleth her, hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand which bewrayeth itself ; ' that is, a brawling woman is so fierce, that a man can no more tame her tlian shut up the wind in the hollow of his fist, nor hide the smell of a fra- grant ointment when he hath it in his hand ; so ready they are to show their petulancy upon all occasions.
[5.] By being a comfort and a help to him : Gen. ii. 18, ' It is not good that man should be alone ; I will make him a help meet for him.' The woman is to be a help, not a hindrance ; not the governor, for the right is originally in the man, but a help in government, to ease him in part of his burden and cares ; a help every way, for the comfort of society, for assistance in governing the family, for the increasing and for the propagation and continuance of posterity ; for these uses was the woman created, and intended by God, though by sin afterward she