Without this assurance there is little comfort in soliloquies ; unless, when we speak to ourselves, we can speak to God as ours. For in des- perate cases our soul can say nothing to itself to still itself, unless it be suggested by God. Discouragements will appear greater to the soul than any comfort, unless God comes in as ours.
See therefore David's art ; he demands of himself why he was so cast down ? The cause was apparent, because there were troubles without and terrors within, and none to comfort. Well, grant this, saith the Spirit of God in him, as the worst must be granted ; yet, saith the Spirit, Trust in God. So I have.
Why, then, wait in trusting ; ' light is sown for the righteous,' Ps. xcvii. 11 ; it comes not up on the sudden. We must not think to sow and reap both at once. If trouble be lengthened, lengthen thy patience. What good ivill come of this ?
God will wait to do thee that good, for which thou shalt praise him ; he will deal so graciously with thee, as he will deserve thy praise ; he will shew thee his salvation. And new favours will stir thee up to sing new songs. Every new recovery of ourselves or friends is as it were a new life, and ministers new matter of praise. And upon offering this sacrifice of praise, the heart is farther enlarged to pray for fresh blessings. We are never fitter to pray than after praise.
But in the mean time I hang down my head, whilst mine enemies carry themselves highly, and my friends stand aloof.
God in his own time, which is best for thee, will be the salvation of thy countenance ; he will compass thee about with songs of deliverance, and make it appear at last that he hath care of thee. But ichy then doth God ajjpear as a stranger to me ? That thou shouldst follow after him with the stronger faith and prayer ; he withdraws himself, that thou shouldst be the more earnest in seeking after him. God speaks the sweetest comfort to the heart in the wilderness. Happily thou art not yet low enough, nor purged enough. Thy affections are not thoroughly crucified to the world, and therefore it will not yet appear that it is God's good will to deliver thee. Wert thou a fit subject of mercy, God would bestow it on thee.
But what ground hast thou to build thyself so strongly upon God ? He hath offered and made himself to be my God, and so hath shewed himself in former times ; and I have made him my God, by yielding him his sovereignty in my heart ; besides the present evidence of his blessed Spirit, clearing the same, and many peculiar tokens of his love which I daily do enjoy ; though sometimes the beams of his favour are echpsed. * That is, ' rudder ' or ' helm,' using the place for the thing. — G.
THE soul's conflict. 289
Those that are God's, besides their interest and right in him, have oft a sense of the same, even in this Ufe, as a foretaste of that which is to come. To the seal of grace stamped upon their hearts, God superadds a fresh seal of joy and corofort, by the presence and witness of his Spirit ; and shews likewise some outward token for good upon them, whereby he makes it appear that * he hath set apart him that is godly for himself, as his own,' Ps. iv. 3.
Thus we see that discussing of objections in the consistory of the soul settles the soul at last, faith at length silencing all risings to the con- trary. All motion tends to rest, and ends in it. God is the centre and resting-place of the soul, and here David takes up his rest, and so let us. Then whatsoever times come, we are sure of a hiding-place and sanctuary.
Finis.
' Although the fig-tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines, the labour of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat, &c., yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation,' Hab. iii. 17.
' He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High, shall lodge under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge, and my fortress ; My God, in him will I trust,' Ps. xci. 1, 2.
' My strength and my heart faileth, but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever,' Ps. Ixxiii. 26.
NOTES.
(a) P. 153. — Nero. Consult Long's excellent memoir of this worst of all the Caesars, in Dr Smith's Dictionary of Greek and Roman Biography and Mythology.
(b) P. 158. — ' File.' ' In good sadness, I do not know ; either it is there, or it is upon a file, with the duke's other letters, in my tent.' — All's Well that Ends WeU, iv. 3.
(c) P. 171. — ' Restrained.' The touching saying told of many, from John Brad- ford to John Newton, and certainly used by the latter, on seeing a criminal ascend- ing the gallows, ' There goes John Newton, but for the grace of God,' illustrates this.