373 AN EXPOSITION UrON PSALM cxxx. [Yer.S.
instances. Delight and exj)ectations are the grounds of our abiding with God. Both these are weakened by a conquering, prevaihng sense of sin, without some relief from the discovery of forgiveness, though at a distance. And, therefore, our perplexed soul stays not here, but presseth on towards that discovery.
Secondly, There is a resting on this frantie that is noxious and hurtful also. Some finding this sense of sin, with those other things that attend it, wrought in them in some measure, begin to think that now all is well, this is all that is of them required. They will endeavour to make a life from such arguments of comfort as they can take from their trouble. They think this a ground of peace, that they have not peace. Here some take up before conversion, and it proves their ruin. Because they are convinced of sin, and troubled about it, and burdened with it, they think it shall be well with them. But were not Cain, Esau, Saul, Ahab, Judas, co^inced of sin and burdened with it? Did this profit them? did it''':xiterest them in the promises? Did not the wrath of God overtake them notwithstanding? So is it with many daily; they think their con- viction is conversion, and that their sins are pardoned because they have been troubled.
This, then, is that which we reject, which the soul in this condi- tion doth carefully avoid, — so to satisfy itself with its humiliation, as to make that a ground of supportment and consolation, being thereby kept off from exercising faith for forgiveness ; for this is, —
1 . xi fruit of self-righteousness. For a soul to place the spring of its peace or comfort in any thing of its own, is to fall short of Christ and to take up in self We must not only be "justified," but " glory" in him also, Isa. xlv. 25. Men may make use of the evidence of their graces, but only as mediums to a farther end ; not as the rest of the soul in the least. And this deprives men's very humiliations of all gospel humility. True humility consists more in believing than in being sensible of sin. That is the soul's great self-emptying and abasing; this may consist with an obstinate resolution to scamble for something upon the account of self-endeavours.
2. Though evangelical sense of sin be a grace, yet it is not the uniting grace; it is not that which interests us in Christ, not that which peculiarly and in its own nature exalts him. There is in this sense of sin that which is natural and that which is spiritual; or the matter of it and its spirituality. The former consists in sorrow, trouble, self-abasement, dejection, and anxiety of mind, "svith the like passions. Of these I may say, as the apostle of affiictions, " They are not joyous, but grievous." They are such as are accompanied with the aversation of the object which they are convei-sant aliout. In their own nature they are no more but the soul's retreat into itself,
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Ver.-i.] THE WORDS OF THE VERSE EXPLAINED, S79
witli an abhorrency of tlie objects of its sorrow and grief. When these affections are spiritualized, their nature is not clianged. The soul in and by them acts according to their nature; and doth by them, as such, but retreat into itself, with a dislike of that they are exercised about. To take up here, then, must needs be to sit down short of Christ, whether it be for life or consolation.
Let there be no mistake. There can be no evangelical sense of sin and humiliation where there is not union with Christ, Zech. xii. 10. Only in itself and in its own nature it is not availing. Now, Christ is the only rest of our souls; in any thing, for any end or purpose, to take up short of him is to lose it. It is not enough that we be " prisoners of hope," but we must " turn to our stronghold," Zech. ix. 12; not enough that we are 'Sveary and heavy laden," but we must " come to him," Matt. xi. 28-30. It vv^ill not suffice that we are weak, and know we are weak, but we must " take hold on the strength of God," Isa. xxvii. 4, 5.
S. Indeed, pressing after forgiveness is the very life and i^oiver of evangelical humiliation. How shall a man know that his humi- liation is evangelical, that his sorrow is according to God ? Is it not from hence he may be resolved, that he doth not in it as Cain did, who cried his sins were greater than he could bear, and so departed from the presence of God; nor as Judas did, who repented and hanged himself ; nor as Felix did, — tremble for a while, and then re- turn to his lusts ; nor as the Jews did in the prophet, pine away under their iniquities because of vexation of heart? Nor doth he divert his thoughts to other things, thereby to relieve his soul in his trouble; nor fix upon a righteousness of his own ; nor slothfully lie down under his perplexity, but in the midst of it he plies himself to God in Christ for pardon and mercy. And it is the soul's application unto God for forgiveness, and not its sense of sin, that gives unto God the glor}'' of his grace.