And _First_, In all lawful marriages, it is absolutely necessary, that the parties to be joined together in that holy and honourable estate, are actually and legally freed from all pre-engagements whatsoever. “A woman is bound to her husband, (saith the apostle) so long as her husband liveth.” The same law holds good in respect to the man. And so likewise, if either party be betrothed and promised, though not actually married to another, the marriage is not lawful, till that pre-engagement and promise be fairly and mutually dissolved. Now, it is just thus between us and the LORD JESUS. For, we are all by nature born under, and wedded to the law, as a covenant of works. Hence it is that we are so fond of, and artfully go about, in order to establish a righteousness of our own. It is as natural for us to do this, as it is to breathe. Our first parents, _Adam_ and _Eve_, even after the covenant of grace was revealed to them in that promise, “the seed of the woman shall bruise the serpent’s head,” reached out their hands, and would again have taken hold of the tree of life, which they had forfeited, had not GOD drove them out of paradise, and compelled them, as it were, to be saved by grace. And thus all their descendants naturally run to, and want to be saved, partly at least, if not wholly, by their works. And even gracious souls, who are inwardly renewed, so far as the old man abides in them, find a strong propensity this way. Hence it is, that natural men are generally so fond of _Arminian_ principles. “Do and live,” is the native language of a proud, self-righteous heart. But before we can say, “our Maker is our husband,” we must be divorced from our old husband the law; we must renounce our own righteousness, our own doings and performances, in point of dependence, whether in whole or part, as dung and dross, for the excellency of the knowledge of CHRIST JESUS our LORD. For thus speaks the apostle _Paul_ to the _Romans_, chapter vii. 4. “Ye also are become dead to the law (as a covenant of works) by the body of CHRIST, that ye should be married to another, even to him, who is raised from the dead.” As he also speaketh in another place, “I have espoused you, as a chaste virgin to JESUS CHRIST.” This was the apostle’s own case. Whilst he depended on his being a _Hebrew_ of the _Hebrews_, and thought himself secure, because, as to the outward observation of the law, he was blameless; he was an entire stranger to the divine life: but when he began to experience the power of JESUS CHRIST’s resurrection, we find him, in his epistle to the _Philippians_, absolutely renouncing all his external privileges, and all his pharisaical righteousness; “Yea, doubtless, and I count all things but loss, nay but dung, that I may win CHRIST, and be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of JESUS CHRIST, the righteousness which is of GOD by faith.” And thus it must be with us, ere we can say, “our Maker is our husband.” Though we may not be wrought upon in that extraordinary way in which the apostle was, yet we must be dead to the law, we must be espoused as chaste virgins to JESUS CHRIST, and count all external privileges, and our most splendid performances (as was before observed) only “as dung and dross, for the excellency of the knowledge of JESUS CHRIST our LORD.”
But further; before a marriage among us can stand good in law, both parties must not only be freed from all pre-engagements, but there must be a mutual consent on both sides. We are not used to marry people against their wills. This is what the _Jews_ called betrothing, or espousing, a thing previous to the solemnity of marriage. Thus we find, the Virgin _Mary_ is said to be espoused to _Joseph_, before they actually came together, _Matthew_ i. 18. And thus it is among us. Both parties are previously agreed, and, as it were, espoused to each other, before we publish, what we call the banns of marriage concerning them. And so it will be in the spiritual marriage, between JESUS CHRIST and our souls. Before we are actually married or united to him by faith; or, to keep to the terms of the text, before we assuredly can say, that “our Maker is our husband,” we must be made willing people in the day of GOD’s power, we must be sweetly and effectually persuaded by the Holy Spirit of GOD, that the glorious _Emmanuel_ is willing to accept of us, just as we are, and also that we are willing to accept of him upon his own terms, yea, upon any terms. And when once it comes to this, the spiritual marriage goes on apace, and there is but one thing lacking to make it compleat. And what is that? An actual union.