Here is Adam, the destroyer of the world; here is Lot, that lay with both his daughters; here is Abraham, that was sometime an idolater, and Jacob, that was a supplanter, and Reuben, that lay with his father’s concubine, and Judah that lay with his daughter-in-law, and Levi and Simeon that wickedly slew thee Shechemites, and Aaron that great backslider, and Manassah that man of blood and that made an idol to be worshipped, and that proclaimed a religious feast unto it. Here is also Rachab the harlot, and Bathsheba that bare a bastard to David. Here is Solomon a witch. Time would fail me to tell you of the woman of Canaan’s daughter, Magdalen, of Matthew the publican, and of Gideon and Sampson, and many thousands more.
Alas! alas! I say, what will these sinners do, that have, through their unbelief, eclipsed the glorious largeness of the mercy of God, and gave way to despair of salvation, because of the bigness of their sins?
For all these, though now glorious saints in light, were sometimes sinners of the biggest size, who had sins that were of a notorious hue; yet now, I say, they are in their shining and heavenly robes before the throne of God and of the Lamb, blessing for ever and ever that Son of God for their salvation, who died for them upon the tree; admiring that ever it should come into their hearts once to think of coming to God by Christ; but above all, blessing God for granting of them light to see those encouragements in his testament; without which, without doubt, they had been daunted and sunk down under guilt of sin and despair, as their fellow-sinners have done.
But now they also are witnesses for God, and for his grace against an unbelieving world; for, as I said, they shall come to convince the world of their speeches, their hard and unbelieving words, that they have spoken concerning the mercy of God, and the merits of the passion of his blessed Son Jesus Christ.
But will it not, think you, strangely put to silence all such thoughts, and words, and reasonings of the ungodly before the bar of God? Doubtless it will; yea and will send them away from his presence also, with the greatest guilt that possibly can fasten upon the consciences of men.
For what will sting like this?—I have, through mine own foolish, narrow, unworthy, undervaluing thoughts, of the love and ability of Christ to save me, brought myself to everlasting ruin. It is true, I was a horrible sinner; not one in a hundred did live so vile a life as I: but this should not have kept me from closing with Jesus Christ: I see now that there are abundance in glory that once were as bad as I have been: but they were saved by faith, and I am damned by unbelief.
Wretch that I am! why did not I give glory to the redeeming blood of Jesus? Why did I not humbly cast my soul at his blessed footstool for mercy? Why did I judge of his ability to save me by the voice of my shallow reason, and the voice of a guilty conscience? Why betook not I myself to the holy word of God? Why did I not read and pray that I might understand, since now I perceive that God said then, he giveth liberally to them that pray, and upbraideth not; Jam. i. 5.
It is rational to think, that by such cogitations as these the unbelieving world will be torn in pieces before the judgment of Christ; especially those that have lived where they did or might have heard the gospel of the grace of God. Oh! that saying, “It shall be more tolerable for Sodom at the judgment than for them,” will be better understood. See Luke x. 8–12.
This reason, therefore, standeth fast; namely, that Christ, by offering mercy in the first place to the biggest sinner now, will stop all mouths of the impenitent at the day of judgment, and cut off all excuse that shall be attempted to be made (from the thoughts of the greatness of their sins) why they came not to him.
I have often thought of the day of judgment, and how God will deal with sinners at that day; and I believe it will be managed with that sweetness, with that equitableness, with that excellent righteousness, as to every sin, and circumstance, and aggravation thereof; that men that are damned, before the judgment is over shall receive such conviction of the righteous judgment of God upon them, and of their deserts of hell-fire, that they shall in themselves conclude that there is all the reason in the world that they should be shut out of heaven, and go to hell-fire: “These shall go away into everlasting punishment;” Matt. xxv. 46.
Only this will tear them, that they have missed of mercy and glory, and obtained everlasting damnation through their unbelief; but it will tear but themselves, but their own souls; they will gnash upon themselves; for in that mercy was offered to the chief of them in the first place, and yet they were damned for rejecting of it; they were damned for forsaking what they had a sort of propriety in; for forsaking their own mercy.