Further, that the laborers work happily together among themselves, and that I go on happily in service with them; that I be their servant, on the one hand, and yet, on the other, maintain the place which God has given me in this work; surely, if any one carefully looks at this, he will at once see that there is a difficulty and a "need" far greater than any that is connected with _money_. O, how these matters lead one to call upon God! How they continually make one sensible of one's "need!" Truly, I am in need, in continual need. I might refer to many more points, in connection with this work, in which I am more or less continually in "need;" but I will only mention one. It is now many years since I have made my boast in the living God in so public a manner by my publications. On this account Satan unquestionably is waiting for my halting, and if I were left to myself I should fall a prey to him. Pride, unbelief, or other sins would be my ruin, and lead me to bring a most awful disgrace upon the name of Jesus. Here is then a "need," a great "need." I do feel myself in "need," in great "need," even to be upheld by God; for I cannot stand for a moment if left to myself. O that none of my dear readers might admire me, and be astonished at my faith, and think of me as if I were beyond unbelief! O, that none of my dear readers might think that I could not be puffed up by pride, or in other respects most awfully dishonor God, and thus at last, though God has used me in blessing hitherto to so many, become a beacon to the church of Christ! No, I am as weak as ever. I need as much as ever to be upheld as to faith, and every other grace. I am therefore in "need," in great "need;" and therefore help me, dear Christian reader, with your prayers.
I allow, then, most fully that I am in continual "need." This is the case with regard to money matters, because the work is now so large. A few hundred pounds go but a little way. There have often been weeks when my demands have been several hundred pounds a week, and it can therefore easily be supposed that, even if large donations come in, they do not last long. But whilst I allow this, I desire that the Christian reader may keep in mind that there are other necessities, and even greater ones than those connected with _money_. Should, however, the reader say that he thinks "_I must find this a very trying life, and that I must be tired of it_," I beg to state that he is entirely mistaken. I do not find the life in connection with this work a trying life, but a very happy one. It is impossible to describe the abundance of peace and heavenly joy that often has flowed into my soul by means of the fresh answers which I have obtained from God, after waiting upon him for help and blessing; and the longer I have had to wait upon him, or the greater my need was, the greater the enjoyment when at last the answer came, which has often been in a very remarkable way, in order to make the hand of God the more manifest. I do therefore solemnly declare that I do not find this life a trying life, but a very happy one, and I am consequently not in the least tired of it. Straits and difficulties I expected from the very beginning. Before I began this service I expected them; nay, the chief object of it was, that the church at large might be strengthened in faith, and be led more simply, habitually, and unreservedly to trust in the living God, by seeing his hand stretched out in my behalf in the hour of need. I did, therefore, expect trials, great trials and straits; but cheerfully, for the glory of God, and the profit of God's dear children, did I desire to pass through them, if only the saints might be benefited by the dealings of God with me. The longer I go on in this service, the greater the trials of one kind or another become; but at the same time the happier I am in this my service, and the more I am assured that I am engaged as the Lord would have me to be. How then could I be tired of carrying on the work of God on such principles as I do?