Immediately on my arrival at Stuttgart, yea, the very first hour that I was there, so heavy a trial of faith came upon me, that it was one of the sharpest trials which I ever have had. The cause of it I am not at liberty to mention. But so much as this, it was in connexion with my going to Stuttgart, and, humanly speaking, the thing would not have occurred, had I not gone thither. The trial was of a double character; for it was not only the thing itself, great as the trial of my faith was on that account; but it was as though the question were put to me in the strongest way:--Are you willing to make sacrifices in connexion with your service here? And do you really lean upon me, the living God, in your service here? But thanks to the Lord, Satan did not prevail. My heart was enabled to say almost immediately:--"All things work together for good to them that love God." I know this also does work together for my good. I know it is the very best thing for me.--Thus peace was almost immediately restored to me, and I was enabled to leave the matter quietly in the hands of the Lord. Nor was it many days before I could say from my inmost soul, if even then I could have had it in my power to alter the thing, which occasioned the great trial, and the consequences of which were then still remaining, and were remaining all the time while I was in Germany, yet I would not have wished it to be altered. And since my return to England I have again and again had reason to admire the goodness of the Lord in having allowed this thing to be as it was, for it proved in the end in every way good to me. May the believing reader leave himself more and more unreservedly in the hands of the Lord, and he will find it to be just as the writer has found it, i. e. that our greatest trials often turn out to be our greatest blessings.--Had I gone, however, in my own strength to Stuttgart, and had I not been led to treasure up so many petitions in heaven before I went, I should, in all human probability, have been quite overcome by this very first trial.
This was not the only trial which befel me there, but they were so many, so great, and so long continued, that I required every particle of experience, wisdom, and grace, humanly speaking, which the Lord had been pleased to intrust me with. I could not but again and again admire the wisdom of the Lord in having sent me only in the year 1843 to Germany, and not several years before, as I often had been advised to go long before I did. For had I gone without having the experience which I had gathered in my service among the saints during the 13 1/2 years previously, and without having had my soul exercised before God in trials of patience, and hope, and faith, as it has been since November 1830, humanly speaking, I should have been overwhelmed. But, as it was, my soul, through grace, having learned to deal with God about every thing, I was sustained by casting all my care upon Him, and looking to Him for help, and expecting help from Him, though every thing looked dark in every way. And thus it came, that all the difficulties were overcome one after another. But more about this when I come to relate some of the peculiar difficulties in connexion with my service at Stuttgart.