_Particular questions relating to resignation and meekness._
1. Have I endeavoured to will what God wills, and that only?
2. Have I received every thing that has befallen me, without my choice, as the choice of infinite wisdom and goodness for me, with thanks?
3. Have I (after doing what he requires of me to do concerning them) left all future things absolutely to God’s disposal? That is, have I laboured to be wholly indifferent to whichsoever way he shall ordain for me?
4. Have I resumed my claim to my body, soul, friends, fame, or fortune, which I have made over to God; or repented of my gift, when God accepted any of them at my hands?
5. Have I endeavoured to be chearful, mild and courteous in whatever I said or did?
6. Have I said any thing with a stern look, accent or gesture? Particularly with regard to religion?
MY Lord and my God, thou seest my heart, and my desires are not hid from thee. I am encouraged by my happy experience of thy goodness (particularly this day past) to present myself before thee, notwithstanding I know myself unworthy of the least favour from thee. I am ashamed when I think, how long I have lived a stranger, yea, an enemy to thee, taking upon me to dispose of myself, and to please myself in the main course of my life. But I now unfeignedly desire to return unto thee, and renouncing all interest and propriety in myself, to give myself up entirely to thee: I would be thine, and only thine for ever. But I know I am nothing, and can do nothing of myself: and if ever I am thine, I must be wholly indebted to thee for it. O my God, my Saviour, my Sanctifier, turn not away thy face from a poor soul that seeks thee: but as thou hast kindled in me these desires, so confirm, increase, and satisfy them. Reject not that poor gift which I would make of myself unto thee, but teach me so to make it, that it may be acceptable in thy sight. Lord, hear me, help me, and shew mercy unto me for _Jesus Christ_’s sake.
To thee, O God, Father, Son and Holy Ghost, my Creator, Redeemer, and Sanctifier, I give up myself entirely: may I no longer serve myself, but thee, all the days of my life.
I give thee my understanding: may it be my only care to know thee, thy perfections, thy works and thy will. Let all things else be _as dung and dross_ unto me, for the excellency of this knowledge. And let me silence all reasonings against whatsoever thou teachest me, who canst neither deceive, nor be deceived.
I give thee my will: may I have no will of my own: whatsoever thou willest, may I will, and that only. May I will thy glory in all things as thou dost, and make that my end in every thing; may I ever say with the Psalmist, _Whom have I in heaven but thee, and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee_. May I delight to do thy will O God, and rejoice to suffer it. Whatever threatens me let me say, _It is the_ Lord, _let him do what seemeth him good_: and whatever befalls me, let me give thanks, since it is thy will concerning me.
I give thee my affections; do thou dispose of them all: be thou my love, my fear, my joy: and may nothing have any share in them, but with respect to thee and for thy sake. What thou lovest may I love, what thou hatest may I hate, and that in such measures as thou art pleased to prescribe me.
I give thee my body: may I glorify thee with it, and preserve it holy, fit for thee, O God, to dwell in; may I neither indulge it, nor use too much rigor towards it; but keep it, as far as in me lies, healthy, vigorous and active, and fit to do thee all manner of service, which thou shalt call for.
I give thee all my worldly goods: may I prize them and use them only for thee. May I faithfully restore to thee, in the poor, all thou hast intrusted me with, above the necessaries of life; and be content to part with ♦them too, whenever thou my Lord, shalt require them at my hands.
♦ “it” replaced with “them” per Errata
I give thee my credit and reputation: may I never value it, but only in respect of thee; nor endeavour to maintain it, but as it may do thee service and advance thy honour in the world.
I give thee myself and my all: let me look upon myself to be nothing, and to have nothing out of thee. Be thou the sole disposer and governor of myself and all; be thou my portion and my all.
O my God and my all, when hereafter I shall be tempted to break this solemn engagement, when I shall be prest to conform to the world, and to the company and customs that surround me; may my answer be, _I am not my own_; I am not for myself, nor for the world, but for my God. I will give unto God the things which are God’s. God be merciful to me a sinner.