Page 38. “The attention of all was soon fixed, on poor _L―――― S――――_. One so violently and variously torn of the evil one, did I never see before. Sometimes, she laughed till almost strangled; and then broke out into cursing and blaspheming; then stamped and struggled with incredible strength, so that four or five could scarce hold her: then cried out, ‘O eternity! eternity! O that I had no soul! O that I had never been born!’ At last she faintly called on Christ to help her. And the violence of her pangs ceased.”
(It should be remembered, that from that time to this, her conversation has been as becometh the gospel.)
Page 63. _Thursday, December 25._ “I met with such a case as I do not remember either to have known or heard of before. _L―――― S――――_ (the same person) after many years of mourning (long before she heard of us) was filled with peace and joy in believing. In the midst of this, without any discernable cause, such a cloud suddenly overwhelmed her, that she could not believe her sins were ever forgiven at all, nor that there was any such thing as forgiveness of sins. She could not believe, that the scriptures were true, that there was any heaven, or hell, or angel, or spirit, or any God. One more I have since found in the same state. (But observe, neither of these continued therein: nor did I ever know one that did.) So sure it is, that all faith is the gift of God, which the moment he withdraws, the evil heart of unbelief will poison the whole soul.”
Which of these is an _instance of the most desperate despair_? Surely the _most desperate_ of any, yea, the only one which is properly said to be desperate at all, is that which produces instant self-murder: which causes a poor wretch, by a sin which he cannot repent of, to rush strait through death into hell. But that was not the case in any of these instances; in all which we have already _seen the end of the_ Lord.
15. That I raise separate ¹_societies against the church_, is a charge which I need not examine till the evidence is produced. You next cite a _Moravian_’s words to me (an _Englishman_ joined with the _Moravians_) _You have eyes full of adultery, and cannot cease from sin; you take upon you to guide unstable souls, and lead them in the way of damnation_: and remark, _This is only returning some of your own treatment upon yourself. Here also you set the pattern._ At what time and place? When and where were _such abuses as these thrown out by me, against our universities, and against our regular clergy, not the highest or the worthiest excepted_? I am altogether clear in this matter, as often as it has been objected: neither do I desire to receive any other treatment from the clergy, than they have received from me to this day.
¹ Remarks, page 14.
You have a note at the bottom of this page which runs thus: _see page 71, 77, and 73, where some_ Methodists _said, they had heard both your brother and you many times preach popery_.
I am afraid, you advance here a wilful untruth, purely _ad movendam invidiam_. For you cannot but know, 1. That there is not one word of _preaching popery_, either in the 71st or 77th page: and, 2. That when Mr. C. and two other _predestinarians_ (as is related, page 73) affirmed, _They had heard both my brother and me many times preach popery_, they meant neither more nor less thereby, than the doctrine of _universal redemption_.
16. _You proceed_, ¹Kingswood _you call_ your own house. _And when one Mr._ C. _opposed you there, you reply to him, “You should not have supplanted me in_ my own house, _stealing the hearts of the people”――――The parochial clergy may call their several districts their_ own houses, _with much more propriety than you could call_ Kingswood yours. _And yet how have you supplanted them therein, and laboured to steal the hearts of the people――――You have suffered by the same ways you took to discharge your spleen and malice against your brethren._
¹ Remarks, page 15.
_Your brother’s words to Mr._ C. _are――――“Whether his doctrine is true or false is not the question. But you ought first to have fairly told him, ‘I preach contrary to you. Are you willing notwithstanding, that I should continue_ in your house, _gain-saying you?’ Shall I stay here opposing you, or shall I depart?――――Think you hear this spoken to_ you _by_ us――――_What can you justly reply?――――Again, if Mr._ C. _had said thus to you, and you had refused him leave to stay; I ask you, whether in such a case he would have had reason to resent such a refusal? I think you cannot say he would. And yet how loudly have you objected our refusing our pulpits to you!_
So you judge these to be exactly parallel cases. It lies therefore upon me to shew, that they are not parallel at all: that there is, in many respects, an essential difference between them.