7. And it is no small patience which the natural imbecility of the female sex requireth you to prepare. Except it be very few that are patient and manlike, women are commonly of potent fantasies, and tender, passionate, impatient spirits, easily cast into anger, or jealousy, or discontent; and of weak understandings, and therefore unable to reform themselves. They are betwixt a man and a child: some few have more of the man, and many have more of the child; but most are but in a middle state. Weakness naturally inclineth persons to be froward and hard to please; as we see in children, old people, and sick persons. They are like a sore, distempered body; you can scarce touch them but you hurt them. With too many you can scarce tell how to speak or look but you displease them. If you should be very well versed in the art of pleasing, and set yourselves to it with all your care, as if you made it your very business and had little else to do, yet it would put you hard to it, to please some weak, impatient persons, if not quite surpass your ability and skill. And the more you love them, the more grievous it will be, to see them still in discontents, weary of their condition, and to hear the clamorous expressions of their disquiet minds. Nay, the very multitude of words that very many are addicted to, doth make some men's lives a continual burden to them. Mark what the Scripture saith: Prov. xxi. 9, "It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house." Ver. 19, "It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and angry woman." So chap. xxv. 24, and xxvii. 15, "A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike." Eccles. vii. 28, "One man among a thousand have I found; but a woman among all those have I not found."
8. And there is such a meeting of faults and imperfections on both sides, that maketh it much the harder to bear the infirmities of others aright. If one party only were froward and impatient, the stedfastness of the other might make it the more tolerable; but we are all sick, in some measure, of the same disease. And when weakness meeteth with weakness, and pride with pride, and passion with passion, it exasperateth the disease and doubleth the suffering. And our corruption is such, that though our intent be to help one another in our duties, yet we are apter far to stir up one another's distempers.
9. The business, care, and trouble of a married life, is a great temptation to call down our thoughts from God, and to divert them from the "one thing necessary," Luke x. 42; and to distract the mind, and make it undisposed to holy duty, and to serve God with a divided heart, as if we served him not. How hard is it to pray or meditate with any serious fervency, when you come out of a crowd of cares and business! Hear what Saint Paul saith, 1 Cor. vii. 7, 8, "For I would that all men were as I myself.--I say to the unmarried and the widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I." Ver. 26-28, "I suppose therefore that this is good for the present distress, that it is good for a man so to be:--such shall have trouble in the flesh." Ver. 32, 33, "But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord: but he that is married careth for the things of the world, how he may please his wife." Ver. 34, 35, "The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband. And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction." Ver. 37, 38, "He that standeth stedfast in his heart, having no necessity, but hath power over his own will, and hath so decreed in his heart that he will keep his virgin, doth well. So then he that marrieth doth well, but he that marrieth not doth better." And mark Christ's own words, Matt. xix. 11, "His disciples say unto him, If the case of a man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry. But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given--He that is able to receive it, let him receive it."
10. The business of a married state doth commonly devour almost all your time, so that little is left for holy contemplations, or serious thoughts of the life to come. All God's service is contracted and thrust into a corner, and done as it were on the by: the world will scarce allow you time to meditate, or pray, or read the Scripture; you think yourselves (as Martha) under a greater necessity of despatching your business, than of sitting at Christ's feet to hear his word. Oh that single persons knew (for the most part) the preciousness of their leisure, and how free they are to attend the service of God, and learn his word, in comparison of the married!