5. ..."My soul hath refused to be comforted" (ver. 2). So great weariness did here possess me, that my soul did close the door against all comfort. Whence such weariness to him? It may be that his vineyard hath been hailed on, or his olive hath yielded no fruit, or the vintage hath been interrupted by rain. Whence the weariness to him? Hear this out of another Psalm. For therein is the voice of the same: "weariness hath bowed me down, because of sinners forsaking Thy law." [3496] He saith then that he was overcome with so great weariness because of this sort of evil thing; so as that his soul refused to be comforted. Weariness had well nigh swallowed him up, and sorrow had ingulfed him altogether beyond remedy, he refuseth to be comforted. What then remained? In the first place, see whence he is comforted. Had he not waited for one who might condole with him? [3497] ..."I have been mindful of God, and I have been delighted" (ver. 3). My hands had not wrought in vain, they had found a great comforter. While not being idle, "I have been mindful of God, and I have been delighted." God must therefore be praised, of whom this man being mindful, hath been delighted, and hath been comforted in sorrowful case, and refreshed when safety was in a manner despaired of: God must therefore be praised. In fine, because he hath been comforted, in continuation he saith, "I have babbled." In that same comfort being made mindful of God, I have been delighted, and have "babbled." What is, "I have babbled"? I have rejoiced, I have exulted in speaking. For babblers they are properly called, that by the common people are named talkative, who at the approach of joy are neither able nor willing to be silent. This man hath become such an one. And again he saith what? "And my spirit hath fainted."
6. With weariness he had pined away; by calling to mind God, he had been delighted, again in babbling he had fainted: what followeth? "All mine enemies have anticipated watches" (ver. 4). All mine enemies have kept watch over me; they have exceeded in keeping watch over me; in watching they have been beforehand with me. Where do they not lay traps? Have not mine enemies anticipated all watches? For who are these enemies, but they of whom the Apostle saith, "Ye have not wrestling against flesh and blood." [3498] ...Against the devil and his angels we are waging hostilities. Rulers of the world he hath called them, because they do themselves rule the lovers of the world. For they do not rule the world, as if they were rulers of heaven and earth: but he is calling sinners the world....With the devil and his angels there is no concord. They do themselves grudge us the kingdom of Heaven. They cannot at all be appeased towards us: because "all mine enemies have anticipated watches." They have watched more to deceive than I to guard myself. For how can they have done otherwise than anticipate watches, that have set everywhere scandals, everywhere traps? Weariness doth invest the heart, we have to fear lest sorrow swallow us up: in joy to fear lest the spirit faint in babbling: "all mine enemies have anticipated watches." In fine, in the midst of that same babbling, whiles thou art speaking, and art speaking without fear, how much is oft-times found which enemies would lay hold of and censure, whereon they would even found accusation and slander--"he said so, he thought so, he spake so!" What should man do, save that which followeth? "I have been troubled, and I spake not." Therefore when he was troubled, lest in his babbling enemies anticipating watches should seek and find slanders, he spake not....
7. "I have thought on ancient days" (ver. 5). Now he, as if he were one who had been beaten out of doors, hath taken refuge within: he is conversing in the secret place of his own heart. And let him declare to us what he is doing there. It is well with him. Observe what things he is thinking of, I pray you. He is within, in his own house he is thinking of ancient days. No one saith to him, thou hast spoken ill: no one saith to him, thou hast spoken much: no one saith to him, thou hast thought perversely. Thus may it be well with him, may God aid him: let him think of the ancient days, and let him tell us what he hath done in his very inner chamber, whereunto he hath arrived, over what he hath leaped, where he hath abode. "I have thought on ancient days; and of eternal years I have been mindful." What are eternal years? It is a mighty thought. See whether this thought requireth anything but great silence. Apart from all noise without, from all tumult of things human let him remain quiet within, that would think of those eternal years. Are the years wherein we are eternal, or those wherein our ancestors have been, or those wherein our posterity are to be? Far be it that they should be esteemed eternal. For what part of these years doth remain? Behold we speak and say, "in this year:" and what have we got of this year, save the one day wherein we are. For the former days of this year have already gone by, and are not to be had; but the future days have not yet come. In one day we are, and we say, in this year: nay rather say thou, to-day, if thou desirest to speak of anything present. For of the whole year what hast thou got that is present? Whatsoever thereof is past, is no longer; whatsoever thereof is future, is not yet: how then, "this year"? Amend the expression: say, to-day. Thou speakest truth, henceforth I will say, "to-day." Again observe this too, how to-day the morning hours have already past, the future hours have not yet come. This too therefore amend: say, in this hour. And of this hour what hast thou got? Some moments thereof have already gone by, those that are future have not yet come. Say, in this moment. In what moment? While I am uttering syllables, if I shall speak two syllables, the latter doth not sound until the former hath gone by: in a word, in that same one syllable, if it chance to have two letters, the latter letter doth not sound, until the former hath gone by. What then have we got of these years? These years are changeable: the eternal years must be thought on, years that stand, that are not made up of days that come and depart; years whereof in another place the Scripture saith to God, "But Thou art the Self-same, and Thy years shall not fail." [3499] On these years this man that leapeth over, not in babbling without, but in silence [3500] hath thought.
8. "And I have meditated in the night with my heart" (ver. 6). No slanderous person seeketh for snares in his words, in his heart he hath meditated. "I babbled." Behold there is the former babbling. Watch again, that thy spirit faint not. I did not, he saith, I did not so babble as if it were abroad: in another way now. How now? "I did babble, and did search out my spirit." If he were searching the earth to find veins of gold, no one would say that he was foolish; nay, many men would call him wise, for desiring to come at gold: how great treasures hath a man within, and he diggeth not! This man was examining his spirit, and was speaking with that same his spirit, and in the very speaking he was babbling. He was questioning himself, was examining himself, was judge over himself. And he continueth; "I did search my spirit." He had to fear lest he should stay within his own spirit: for he had babbled without; and because all his enemies had anticipated watches, he found there sorrow, and his spirit fainted. He that did babble without, lo, now doth begin to babble within in safety, where being alone in secret, he is thinking on eternal years....
9. And thou hast found what? "God will not repel for everlasting" (ver. 7). Weariness he had found in this life; in no place a trustworthy, in no place a fearless comfort. Unto whatsoever men he betook himself, in them he found scandal, or feared it. In no place therefore was he free from care. An evil thing it was for him to hold his peace, lest perchance he should keep silence from good words; to speak and babble without was painful to him, lest all his enemies, anticipating watches, should seek slanders in his words. Being exceedingly straitened in this life, he thought much of another life, where there is not this trial. And when is he to arrive thither? For it cannot but be evident that our suffering here is the anger of God. This thing is spoken of in Isaiah, "I will not be an avenger unto you for everlasting, nor will I be angry with you at all times." [3501] ...Will this anger of God always abide? This man hath not found this in silence. For he saith what? "God will not repel for everlasting, and He will not add any more that it should be well-pleasing to Him still." That is, that it should be well-pleasing to Him still to repel, and He will not add the repelling for everlasting. He must needs recall to Himself His servants, He must needs receive fugitives returning to the Lord, He must needs hearken to the voice of them that are in fetters. "Or unto the end will He cut off mercy from generation to generation?" (ver. 8).
10. "Or will God forget to be merciful?" (ver. 9). In thee, from thee unto another there is no mercy unless God bestow it on thee: and shall God Himself forget mercy? The stream runneth: shall the spring itself be dried up? "Or shall God forget to be merciful: or shall He keep back in anger His mercies?" That is, shall He be so angry, as that He will not have mercy? He will more easily keep back anger than mercy.
11. "And I said." Now leaping over himself he hath said what? "Now I have begun:" (ver. 10), when I had gone out even from myself. Here henceforth there is no danger: for even to remain in myself, was danger. "And I said, Now I have begun: this is the changing of the right hand of the Lofty One." Now the Lofty One hath begun to change me: now I have begun something wherein I am secure: now I have entered a certain palace [3502] of joys, wherein no enemy is to be feared: now I have begun to be in that region, where all mine enemies do not anticipate watches. "Now I have begun: this is the changing of the right hand of the Lofty One."
12. "I have been mindful of the works of the Lord" (ver. 11). Now behold him roaming among the works of the Lord. For he was babbling without, and being made sorrowful thereby his spirit fainted: he babbled within with his own heart, and with his spirit, and having searched out that same spirit he was mindful of the eternal years, was mindful of the mercy of the Lord, how God will not repel him for everlasting; and he began now fearlessly to rejoice in His works, fearlessly to exult in the same. Let us hear now those very works, and let us too exult. But let even us leap over in our affections, and not rejoice in things temporal. For we too have our bed. Why do we not enter therein? Why do we not abide in silence? Why do we not search out our spirit? Why do we not think on the eternal years? Why do we not rejoice in the works of God? In such sort now let us hear, and let us take delight in Himself speaking, in order that when we shall have departed hence, we may do that which we used to do while He spake; if only we are making the beginning of Him whereof he spake in, "Now I have begun." To rejoice in the works of God, is to forget even thyself, if thou canst delight in Him alone. For what is a better thing than He? Dost thou not see that, when thou returnest to thyself, thou returnest to a worse thing? "for I shall be mindful from the beginning of Thy wonderful works."
13. "And I will meditate on all Thy works, and on Thy affections I will babble" (ver. 12). Behold the third babbling! He babbled without, when he hinted; he babbled in his spirit within, when he advanced: he babbled on the works of God, when he arrived at the place toward which he advanced. "And on Thy affections:" not on any affections. What man doth live without affections? And do ye suppose, brethren, that they who fear God, worship God, love God, have not any affections? Wilt thou indeed suppose and dare to suppose, that painting, the theatre, hunting, hawking, fishing, engage the affections, and the meditation on God doth not engage certain interior affections of its own, while we contemplate the universe, and place before our eyes the spectacle of the natural world, and therein labour to discover the Maker, and find Him nowhere unpleasing, but pleasing above [3503] all things?