but his testimony to his uprightness? Gen. xxii. 12 : ' Lay not thy hand upon the lad, for now I know thou fearest me, seeing thou hast not withheld thy son, thy only son, from mc' Why, God knew this before; yes, but he speaks it that Abraham may hear, and take it from God's mouth that he was sincere. May be thou art called to deny thy own education, and principles sucked in by it; thy own company ; cross the judgment of those thou highly esteemest ; yea, thy own wisdom and reason ; to entertain a trutli, or to take up a practice merely upon the accoimt of the word; which if thou canst do, and that without affecta- tion of singidarity, or a humour of pride blowing thee that way, it is an act of deep self-denial, and goes most cross to the most ingenuous natures, who are afi-aid of drawing eyes after them, by leaving their company to walk in a path alone ; yea, very loth to oppose their judgment to others, more for number and parts than. their own ; in a word, who love peace so dearly, that they can be willing to pay anything but a sin to purchase it ; in these it must needs be great self-denial, and therefore such as have the greater ground to expect God's evidencing their sincerity to them. He did it to Nathaniel, who had all these bars to keep him from coming to Christ, and believing on him ; yet he did both, and Christ welcomes him with a high and loud testimony to his upright- ness: 'Behold an Israelite indeed, in whom there is no guile,' John i. 47. May be again, the thing God would have thee deny thyself in, is thy wrath, and revenge, which to give thee a fair occasion to do, with the greater demon- stration of thy sincerity, he jouts thy enemy into thy power, and lays him bound as it were under thy hand ; yea, so orders it in his providence, that thou mayest have thy will on him with little noise ; or if it be known, yet the notorious wrongs he hath done thee, and some circumstances in the providence that hath brought him into thy hand, concur to give thee an advantage of putting so handsome a coloiumpon the business as shall apologise for thee in the thoughts of those that hear of it; making them especially who look not narrowly into the matter, rather observe the justice of God on thy enemy's judgment befallen him, than thy injustice and sin, who was the instrument to execute it. Now, when the way lies smooth and fair for thee to walk in, and thy own cori'uption calls thee forth, yea, useth God's name in the matter, to make thee more confident, saying to thee, as they to David, 1 Sam. xxiv. : 'Behold, the, day is come, wherein God hath delivered thy enemy into thy hand, that thou mayest do to him as seemeth good in thine eyes :' now if thou canst withstand the temptation, and instead of avenging thyself upon the person, thy enemy, revenge thyself on thy revenge, thy greater enemy of the two, by paying good into thj' adversary's bosom for the evil he hath done thee ; and when thou hast done this, canst escape another enemy in thy return, I mean pride, so as to come out of the field a humble conqueror, and consecrate the memorial of this victory, not to thy own, but praise of God's name, (as Goliath's sword, which was not kept by David at his own home, to shew what he had done, but in the tabernacle behind the ephod, as a memorial of what God had done by it in David's hand, 1 Sam. xxi. 9 ;) thou hast done that which speaks thee sincere, j'ea, high graduate in this grace, and God will sooner or later let thee know so. David's fame sounds not louder for his victories got in the open field, over his slain enemies, than it doth for that he got in the cave, though an obscure hole, over his own revenge, in sparing the life of Saul, in which you have the case in hand every way fitted. By the renown of his bloody battles, he got ' a great name, like unto the name of the great men that are in the earth,' 2 Sam. vii. 9 ; but by this noble act of self-denial he got a name, great, like unto the name of those that are famed for their holiness in the Scriptiu-e ; and rather than David shall not have the com- mendation of this piece of his self-denial, God will send it to him in the mouth of his very enemy, who cannot hold, though by it he proclaims his own shame and wickedness, but he must justify him as a holy, righteous man, 1 Sam. xxiv. 17 : 'And he,' that is, Saul, 'said unto David, Thou art more righteous than I : thou hast rewarded me good, whereas I have rewarded thee evil.'
3. Continue thou to wait upon God in all the ways of his ordinances, every one in their season ; whenever thou comest to get the comfortable sight of thy sincerity, it is the Spirit of God that must befriend thee in it, or else, like Hagar, thou mayest sit by the well, and not find it ; thou mayest round thy field again and again, but not find the treasure hid in it. It is the Spirit of God
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