4. Christ doth this to set a better p)rice upon his presence xvhcn he comes; to make his presence highly valued when he doth discover himself. Desiderata dia mar/is pi a cent : things long desired please more sweetly. And things, when wanted, are ingratiated to us, as warmth after cold, and meat after hunger ; and so in every particular of this life. And therefore God, to set a greater price on his presence, and that he would be held more strongly when he doth reveal himself, he defers a long time. That is one reason why he did defer revealing himself to Mary, that she might have the more sweet contentment in him when he did reveal himself, as indeed she had. Long deferring of a thing doth but enlarge the soul. Want enlargeth the desire and capacity of the soul, so doth love. Now, when we want that we love, that emptieth the soul marvellously much ; it mortifieth afiection. When God keeps ofi" a long time, and we see it is God only must do it, then the affection is taken ofi' from earthly things, and the heart enlarged to God by love, and the want of the thing we love. And [therefore we set a price on the thing, so that we are wonderfully pleasing to God. It is very beneficial to ourselves. What lost Mary by it ? So shall we lose nothing. AVe have it at last more abundantly. We have it as a mighty favour. Mary taketh this as a new blessing altogether. When things are kept long from us, and God only must discover, when the heart is kept from second causes, the heart is enlarged. Certainly this comes from God, and God should have all the glory of it. God is wise ; and therefore makes us to stay a long time for that we do desire.
We all of us are in Mary's case in a spiritual sense. Some times or other we miss Christ, I mean the sweet sense of Christ. Lay this down for a rule, that Christians ought to walk in sweet communion with God and Christ, and that it ought to be the life of a Christian to maintain the communion that Christ hath vouchsafed between us and himself. Then, certainly, we lose Christ wonderfully ; and not against our minds, but willingly, by our own slighting of him, and by our own undervaluing of him, or by our negligence or presumption. Christ, though he be low, yet he is great, and he will have us to know his gi-eatness. There must be communion with due respect. One way or other we deprive ourselves of the sense and sweetness of communion with Christ. What must we do, then ? We must do as the woman did : turn over every stone ; use all kind of means ; leave not one till we find him ; and when all means are used, wait still. Persevere in waiting, as Peter speaks. Believers, wait ; hold out in waiting, for Christ in his time will come. He cannot hold long. As Joseph did suppress his love and afiection for pohtic ends a
426 A HEAVENLY CONFERENCE.
great while, Gen. xlv. 3, but his pity towards his brethren was such that bis bowels would not sutler him to conceal himself longer; his passion was above his policj' : ' I am Joseph.' And so let us in the use of all things seek Christ and the sweet sense of his love, which is better than life itself. And, indeed, what is all without Christ ? Christ is so full of compassion, ho will not long sufi'er us to be prolonged, but will at length satisfy the hungry soul, Ps. Ixiii. 5. How many promises have wc to this end !
Take heed of such a temper of soul, as cares not whether we find Christ or no. Oh take heed of that! If we will seek him, seek him as Mary. She sought him early in the morning ; she brake her sleep and sought him with tears. If anything be to be sought with tears, it is Christ and com- munion with him. She sought him instantly and constantly. She sought him so, that no impediment could hinder her, she was so full of grief and love.* She sought him with her whole heart, she waited in seeking. That is the way to find Christ. Seek him early, in our younger times, in the morning of our years. Oh that we could seek Christ as we seek our plea- sures. We should find more pleasure in Christ than in all the pleasures of the world, if we could persuade our base hearts so much. Seek him above all other things. Awake with this resolution in our hearts, to find Christ, never to be quiet till we may say with some comfort, ' I am Christ's, and Christ is mine.' When we have him, we have all. Seek him with tears, at length we are sure to find him. He hath bound himself, that if we knock he will open ; and if we seek we shall find : if we seek wisdom early with our whole hearts, entirely, sincerely. Seek Christ for Christ, and then we shall be sure to find him, as she did. Thus seek him in the word and saci'aments, wherein he discovers himself familiarly. Seek him in the temple — ' Christ was found in the temple,' Luke ii. 40 — and then we shall be sure to find him both here and hereafter. Specially we shall find him in our hearts. You see how familiarly he comes to us in the word, speaks to us by a man like ourselves. And how familiarly by the sacrament, by common bread and common wine, sanctified to do great matters above nature, to strengthen faith. He cometh to us through our faces, into our souls in the sacrament. He cometh to us, through our ears in hearing the word, through our sight in seeing the bread broken. He comes by familiar things, and by a familiar manner of conveying, as if he should name every one, ' I come to thee, and give thee my body.' Think with ourselves. Now Christ coineth to me ; when the minister reacheth the bread and comes to me, think of heavenly bread, and of the gift of Christ to me by means. And can he do it more famiharly ? Is it not as if be would say, 'Mary'? And that is the excellency of the sacrament. It conveyeth Christ to all the saints, and to every one in particular, as if he named every one. And what an encouragement is this to answer again, to open our hearts to receive him, together with the elements ! to embrace Christ, join with Christ, and then to keep him when we have him ! Do not lose him. He will not be so dealt withal. Remember the covenant we have made to him. I beseech jon, let these sweet considerations of Christ dwell in us, and work on every one of our hearts. If they do good on us here on earth, if we by faith lay hold on him, and have intercourse with him, what will it be in the day of judgment ! How comfortable will it be to hear him say to every one in particular, * Come thou, and thou, stand on my right hand, sit and judge the world with me ?' 1 Cor. vi. 2. Doth he know our names now on earth, and giveth to every one particularly by