Part 74

The reader might say, "You are continually in need. No sooner is the one demand met, than another comes. Do you not find it a trying life, and are you not tired of it?" My reply is, It is true I am more or less continually in need in connexion with this work. And if I were to tell out all my heart to the reader concerning it, he would have still more reason to say that I am continually in need. For what I have here written is almost exclusively about the way in which God has been pleased to supply me with money for carrying on the work; but I do deliberately state that this, much as it might appear to one or the other, is by no means the chief thing that I stand in need of from day to day. I will just hint at a few other things. Sickness among the children, very difficult and tedious cases, in which, notwithstanding all the means which are used month after month, yea year after year, the children remain ill. Nothing remains but either to keep them, or to send them to the Parish Union to which they belong, as they have no relatives able to provide for them. The very fact of having cared for them and watched over them for years, only endears them the more to us, and would make it the more trying to send them back to their parish. This is a "need" which brings me to God. Here is prayer required, not only for means which such sick children call for, but for guidance and wisdom from on High.--Sometimes children are to be placed out as servants or apprentices. A suitable place is needed, or else they had better remain under our care. The obtaining of this suitable place is a "need" indeed. It is more difficult to be obtained than money. Sometimes for many weeks have I had to wait upon God, to have this "need" supplied; but He has always at last helped.--Sometimes great has been my "need" of wisdom and guidance in order to know how certain children ought to be treated under particular circumstances; and especially how to behave towards certain apprentices or servants who were formerly in the Orphan-Houses. A "need" in this respect is no small thing; though I have found that in this and in all other matters concerning which I was in "need," I have been helped, provided I was indeed able to wait patiently upon God. That word, "godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come" (1 Tim. iv. 8), I have in times almost without number found to be true in my own experience. — Further, when one or the other of the labourers needed to leave the work on account of health, or for other reasons, I have been at such times in far greater "need" than when I required money for the various objects of the Institution. I could only have such "need" supplied by waiting upon God. I could do nothing but speak to my heavenly Father about this matter, and He has always helped. One of the greatest difficulties connected with this work is, to obtain suitable Godly persons for it. So many things are to be taken into the account. Suitable age, health, gift, experience, love for children, true godliness, a ready mind to serve God in the work and not themselves, a ready mind to bear with the many trials and difficulties connected with it, a manifest purpose to labour not for the sake of the remuneration, but to serve God in their work; surely, to obtain Godly persons, in whom these qualifications, even in some measure, are found combined, is not an easy matter. Not that any one will suppose me to mean that I am looking out for perfect fellow-labourers. Not that any one will suppose that my fellow-labourers are referred to by rue, as if they were without weaknesses, deficiencies, and failings. I am myself far, very far from being without weaknesses, deficiencies, and failings. Moreover, I never expect to find fellow-labourers for this work who have not their weaknesses; but this I do mean to say, that the work of God in my hands is of that character, and, by God's grace, is really carried on with such a true purpose to serve God thereby (however much I and my fellow-labourers may fail), that it is with me a matter of deep moment to find truly suitable individuals for it, in whom, as much as possible, the above qualifications should be found united. And, however much there may be wanting, this is more and more my aim, that I may obtain such helpers; and hence it can be easily perceived bow great my "need" must be again and again on this very account. I do here especially advise, that if any should apply in future for situations in connexion with this work, they would keep these remarks before them; for, by God's grace, it is my purpose never to give to any persons a situation in connexion with the Institution, if they are not suitable for it according to the light which God gives me.--Further, that the labourers work happily together among themselves, and that I go on happily in service with them; that I be their servant, on the one hand, and yet, on the other, maintain the place which God has given me in this work; surely, if any one carefully looks at this, he will at once see, that there is a difficulty and a "need" far greater than any that is connected with money. Oh, how these matters lead one to call upon God! How they continually make one sensible of one's "need!" Truly, I am in need, in continual need. Many more points might be referred to in connexion with this work, in which I am more or less continually in "need;" but I will only mention one it is now many years since I have made my boast in the living God in so public a manner by my publications. On this account Satan unquestionably is waiting for my halting, and, if left to myself, I should fall a prey to him. Pride, unbelief, or other sins would be my ruin, and lead me to bring a most awful disgrace upon the name of Jesus. Here is then a "need," a great "need." I do feel myself in "need," in great "need," even to be upheld by God; for I cannot stand for a moment, if left to myself. Oh, that none of my dear readers might admire me, and be astonished at my faith, and think of me as if I were beyond unbelief! Oh, that none of my dear readers might think, that I could not be puffed up by pride, or in other respects most awfully dishonour God, and thus at last, though God has used me in blessing hitherto to so many, become a beacon to the church of Christ! No, I am as weak as ever, and need as much as ever to be upheld as to faith, and every other grace. I am therefore in "need," in great "need;" and therefore help me, dear Christian reader, with your prayers.