As I kept silent, I was scourged with rods, and the stripes fell mostly on my abdomen. Having been thus treated, I was let down and again asked; but the Lord be praised, they obtained nothing from me, though I had drank that bitter cup. I was then drawn up again, and scourged as before. O flesh, you must suffer now, I thought. While I was thus suspended in agony, a halberdier ran from the loft and said: “I would rather be dead than that man;” because he only stood there and beheld it.
When I did not reply in regard to anything, the executioner said: “What, will you not answer my lords? Reply to my lords; or have you a dumb devil in you?”
They asked me whether I would advise with myself until Monday, and then tell them the truth (as they call it), in regard to all. I kept silent and thought, why should I advise with myself; I do not want to tell you anyway. I prayed within myself, that the Lord should not suffer me to be tempted above that I was able. I also openly called upon the Lord, and prayed that he would forgive them. The jailer once thought that I was beside myself; but I know nothing about that. The executioner imagined he would make me tell; he had had [he said] so many of our people under his hands, who eventually had to tell everything; but the faithful Helper in distress kept my lips. They then released me, and themselves gave me a respite that I should advise with myself until Monday; but if I should then not do it, I should be dealt with in an extraordinary manner; and they threatened me much, so that it was dreadful to hear. They said this was yet of the least, that it was only child’s play compared to other, future tortures. But when I looked at myself, and beheld my body which was bloody from the scourging; for that was certainly one of the severest pains, I thought to myself: Is this only child’s play? The jailer went away, and said to his wife: “They will torture the man to death.” In short, I was so tortured that they had to dress and undress me. All this the vile flesh had to bear, which has so often grieved me, and would constantly walk in the crooked path, to gratify its lusts; it had deserved yet more. This having taken place in the afternoon, I was not well able to sleep in the night, but counted the striking of the clock all night, and during the night I moaned most lamentably. But afterwards I received a great, peaceful joy and gladness of the Holy Ghost, so great that I cannot adequately describe it; because the Lord had so faithfully kept my lips, and not suffered me to be confounded in my confidence, which I poor, simple servant had already before I was apprehended; but herein the Lord proved me unworthy servant, praised be his name for evermore.
Now when my sufferings became noised through the city, there were worldly people who rejoiced that I had kept my lips sealed: and if such people can rejoice, how much more shall the godfearing rejoice, and praise God.
Further, the appointed day drawing nigh, I earnestly prepared myself for it, and made supplication to my God, that he would not chasten me unworthy servant according to my sins, according to his justice, but according to his fatherly mercy, that he would keep my lips, and alleviate the pain, as he had done the first time.
When the hour approached, my flesh feared, and my soul was afraid, for it had tried it; but I comforted myself as much as I could, thinking: “You will not suffer hereafter, where it will last forever; and this is but a little time.” When I came upon the torture loft, on Tuesday (it was delayed a day), I was asked, to what conclusion I had come. I said, that my conscience would not allow it; I could not do what they requested.