Hence I hope that he will exercise mercy above justice over us, since he sees our tribulation, and knows that I, for my part, am not able to bear it, because my weakness is so great; for among all that fear God there is no one so imperfect as I am. For my miserable weakness is so manifold, that I often bewail it with tears, and I am so despondent that it seems to me that my heart is convulsed, because the Lord does not take away my reproach. Hence I may well say with David: “O Lord God of my salvation, I have cried day and night before thee: let my prayer come before thee: incline thine ear unto my cry; for my soul is full of troubles: and my life draweth nigh unto the grave. I am counted with them that go down into the pit; I am as a man that hath no strength: free among the dead, like the slain that lie in the grave, whom thou rememberest no more: and they are cut off from thy hand. Thou hast laid me in the lowest pit, in darkness, in the deeps. Thy wrath lieth hard upon me, and thou hast afflicted me with all thy waves (Ps. 88:1–7); for all my persecutors hold counsel against me, utterly to starve my hungry soul, and to deprive my thirsty soul of drink. Hence I may well say with the prophet: My enemies wait for my soul, and they render me evil for good, to bring me into sorrow. Ps. 56:6.
Hence, O my love, my dearest love, I cannot forbear to utter my complaint before you, to ease my sorrowful heart, which is often so disconsolate, yea, so disconsolate, that I might well say with David, in my despondency: O Lord, I am cut off from before thine eyes (Ps. 31:22); yet I trust that he will before long hear the voice of my supplication. Hence I pray you, my dear lamb, let not your ears become weary of hearing my sorrowful complaint, nor let your eyes tire of beholding my afflicted countenance. I hope that the Lord will so order it, that it will not last much longer; hence bear patiently with me for a little while yet, even as you have always done towards me. For when it did not go well with us according to the flesh, you always showed more patience than I, for which I heartily thank you. For your hands were more diligent than mine to maintain the household; and you walked more piously by your faith before God, than I; and your patience is greater even until this present day, than mine. Hence I have good reason to love you more than Paul loved the church at Ephesus, which he yet for three years warned night and day, with anxiety, with watching, and with tears. Acts 20:19,31. O my lamb, my love, my dearest love, I have now, God be praised, also had you for about three years, and have in these our bonds of tribulation had great anxiety day and night for you, and have sighed so many a sigh, and wept so many a tear, which I would not have wept, had I been able to speak to you. But now, my affectionately beloved wife, since God has so ordered it, that I must leave you, and, as it seems, go before, I say thus: Though I am not worthy to exhort you, I yet exhort you in this letter with tears, and beseech you, always to have the Lord before your eyes, and to cleave to him with prayer and fasting. For I know that if God takes me out of the flesh before you, that you will after my departure be severely assailed; and therefore I beseech you, O my only lamb, for the Lord’s sake, that you will watch circumspectly, as did the good and wise virgins, who expected their bridegroom every hour. And I pray you, O my love, my dearest love, if I have found grace before your eyes, remember me, even as the pious, godfearing Judith remembered her husband. Jud. 16:22. O Beliken, Beliken, my dearly beloved, the three years which we have lived together do not seem to me to be three days; hence when I think of the parting, my heart is troubled. Yet I would, if it must be, that the Lord would come speedily. For I have, the Lord knows, so many sore vexations, so that I may well utter my complaint with David, and say: “O Lord, my chastisement is ready every morning” (Ps. 73:14); for he that seeks my soul, as a bird without cause, neither sleeps nor slumbers day nor night, evening nor morning; but I expect with Paul, that God, before long, will deliver me and us all out of the mouth of the lion. 2 Tim. 4:17. Further, my affectionately beloved wife, Beliken van der Straten, whom I love from the heart, let me, please tell your love, that I do not know much more to write at this time, but I commend you to almighty God, and to his comforting word. Moreover, I take leave from you, even as bound Israel, who gave their children the last milk; however, God who made the heavenly hosts, is well able to turn the elephants back again. 3 Macc. 180. His will be done, and not ours. Nothing more. The Lord be with you. Greet them that are with you, from me. Adrian also greets you much.