9. His love of souls cannot easily be described, especially those that were more immediately under his care. If any thing was amiss in his class or band, he often felt the weight, before he discovered the reason of it: and would lay it home to them with the greatest earnestness, till he had found out the accursed thing. But his love was by no means confined to these. He would lament over sinners of every kind, those especially who would not hear the call of God, with inexpressible grief and tenderness. The prophet _Jeremiah_ was in this his particular favourite. He used to tell much concerning, “The weeping prophet:” And was often saying to himself, _O that my head were waters, and mine eyes a fountain of tears! If ye will not hear, my soul shall weep for you in secret places._
10. By this eager love of souls, he was even constrained at the time we had no preacher among us, himself to exhort, first our own, and then other societies, _to continue in the grace of God_. But he had many sharp trials concerning this, fearing he should run before he was sent: till one day in _May_ last, being in deep distress, he went up into his room, threw himself down before God, and ceased not to wrestle with him in prayer, till all his doubts fled away, and he was fully convinced what was the will of God concerning him.
11. He often complained, that the world was a burthen to him, and he wanted to be wholly sequestered from it. But God convinced him at length, this was not right. “I now, said he, see plainly, there is such a thing as going through any business, and taking all prudent care, yet so as it shall only pass through our hands, without either troubling or intangling our hearts.”
12. For some time he was under another mistake. He was even to an extreme, negligent of his apparel, thinking it was below the character of a Christian, to have any, the least concern about it. But afterwards he was clearly convinced, that in this also he had gone too far, and that a Christian ought even by his outward neatness, to shew forth the purity of his mind.
13. The last great temptation into which he fell, was that of denying to the body even what was necessary for its support. Though he worked hard at his own business, and spent his strength very much, in all the intervals of his work, in going up and down and exhorting the societies, he could not be prevailed on to take any cordial, or any thing for the preserving of his lungs. For a considerable time before he was sick, he wholly abstained from flesh. And even other victuals he took at his father’s table, as if he was stealing it; and it seemed by his manner, as if he seldom or never eat so as to satisfy nature. The error of this was not shewed him, till a day or two before he was taken ill: when he was fully convinced, that seeing the body as well as the soul is committed to our charge, we ought with prudence and moderation to use all proper means, for preserving the one as well as the other.
14. This temptation, I believe, began and ended, while he walked in the broad light of God’s countenance: which he enjoyed with little intermission for two or three months before his last sickness. Indeed it increased very much toward the period of his life: He saw the corruptions that remained in his heart. But though they were not destroyed, yet they were fast bound, so that they could not hurt him. The only shadow of doubt which he had was this: Whether the peace he had was not too great, while sin remained? But this was but a few moments at a time. And “e’er he was aware (he said) his soul flew back and center’d in God.”
15. On _Wednesday, August 13_. _John Trembath_, being ill of a malignant fever, and as it was believed both by himself and others, ready to depart, desired to take his leave of the family. _Samuel_ stooped down to kiss him, and was immediately sensible he had caught the distemper. However he met the society in the evening, and was unusually vehement in prayer. _Thursday_, the 14th, he continued working at his trade, till about four in the afternoon. Being then obliged to leave off, he came in to his parents, and said, he was not well. He talked of sickness and death with as much ease as of going to sleep, and mostly with a smiling countenance. Towards evening he took his bed: As he lay down he said, “Once I laid on this bed, full of guilt and fears; but now they are all taken away. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, for sending his messengers into these parts. Now is the harvest come. Now I shall reap the end of all my prayers.”