I felt my soul instantly strengthened. And every word was so opened and applied, that to this day it seems new whenever I read it: particularly that promise, _Thou shall decree a thing, and it shall be established, and the light shall shine on thy ways_. Indeed the whole appeared more full and strong than I have words to express.
Two or three days after we received five guineas; the same day three more, and two from another hand. In a little while we received four more, with a promise of the same yearly. O my God, who would not trust thee? Who would not take thee at thy word?
Perhaps some will wonder, how one who has so great an income as I, can ever experience want. But _you_ know what I have. You know likewise, that before I took any children, I every year spent more than my income, trusting that God would supply what was lacking. Others may wonder at my present _imprudent_ way of proceeding; but I _know in whom I have believed_. Indeed had I sought the praise of men, I should have taken care of myself rather than of others. For I know, _so long as thou dost well unto thyself, men will speak well of thee_. But we have chose the cross for our portion, and we cannot give it up.
A few days since having paid the week’s bill, my friend said, “We have but a few shillings left.” The Tuesday following I received two letters. Opening one of them I was a little surprised, to find a guinea inclosed, with the following lines from one I had never conversed with.
_November 5, 1764._
“My dear child,
With much pleasure I heard your charitable design, which I pray God to bless and succeed. Be never discouraged, though divine wisdom should exercise you at times, even with many, great and alarming difficulties: for this is frequently the way in which God leads his children, in order to improve their faith and patience. But even supposing he should not succeed this affair, according to your present plan, yet he will never fail to bless those, who sincerely endeavour to promote his honour, the kingdom of the Lord Jesus, and the good of souls.
“I desire that you would accept of the inclosed, and that you would set me down as an annual contributor of the same sum. May the Lord Jesus Christ be with all of us: forget us not in your prayers. I am, with much respect and regard.
Your very affectionate friend.”
These lines were greatly blest to me, and I found much thankfulness. In the other letter was another guinea inclosed, with these few words: “I have felt your burden, and should be thankful you had more help. But perhaps it is rather the will of God concerning you, to give you day by day your daily bread. I pray him to be with you.” The same night one brought half a guinea from a person unknown, who desired to be set down as an annual contributor of two Guineas.
When a yearly subscription was first proposed, I was averse to it, fearing it might give offence, till a very particular friend, mentioned it to a few of her acquaintance, unknown to us. Afterwards I was convinced, it was of God. It now amounts to about fourteen pounds a year.
Our family at present consists of sixteen: eleven children, one teacher for them, one servant, ourselves, and one lame with the palsy.
When I look back to last Christmas, I am astonished at the loving-kindness of my God! What he hath done for us, and what he hath brought us through, I can easier bless him for, than repeat! One thing more I ask of him: And in this also he will hear me: that he would restore sevenfold into the bosom of those he has made helpful to us, either by prayer, by word, or by deed. And if a cup of cold water is not forgotten before him, surely not one of these shall lose their reward.
O Sir, we have so many mercies, I know not how to leave off recounting them. _Now_ I see that design of God, in joining sister _R._ and me together. It would have been impossible for me to have gone through my present undertaking alone. I know I have neither grace for the spiritual, nor capacity for the temporal part. It is therefore in the greatest tenderness, that our Lord has given her to us as a mother. I trust, both this and every blessing, shall have the effect which God designed in it.
I am,