OF what service, my dear love, can any thing I say be of to you? I have tried all means in my power to keep your mind more steady but in vain. If God has at any time so blessed my letters, that they have made any impression on you it has gone off in two or three days: and when you have had those great benefits indeed of conversing with living Christians, though for a time you have been raised and lively, yet you have soon sunk into your former sloth and carelessness. There must certainly be some hidden corruption in your heart, which causes this inconstancy. I often study you as I would a book, but you are in truth one of the most puzzling books I ever met with. I often rejoice to see in you (as I think) an increase of grace, and a decrease of that pride and selfishness, which under an appearance of humility you once had to a great degree. The last time you was with me, I thought you greatly advanced; and now you are fallen again into pride and selfishness. The Lord Jesus raise you up. Indeed, my dear soul, you grieve and wound me. You bring sorrow in my heart, and tears in my eyes: nay and sometimes your letters tempt me to impatience; but then I immediately recollect my own continual backslidings, and the long-suffering of God towards me, and can I be impatient with my friend? If your want of retirement is not owing to yourself, never lay your coldness upon that: for was your heart sincere, God would strengthen you at all times to look up to him. But if as you say, you trifled away your time, and indulged an unwillingness to prayer, no wonder God with-held that portion of his grace he would otherwise have given you. Depend upon it, whenever you find an unwillingness to pray, that of all times is the most proper for you to pray in; therefore never say on such an occasion, “I will go read some good book, or do some good work, which may perhaps bring my mind into a better frame for prayer.” No, do not so foolishly; but go, and prostrate yourself before God with all your unwillingness; and he will soon give you both the will and the power to praise him. _Amen._
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_My dear Friend_,
IT is impossible for me to judge rightly, till I know more of your affair, and then I doubt not, but God, if we ask in sincerity, will direct us both to agree in our sentiments, as to what will be most conducive to your eternal welfare. However thus much I can say, be not unequally yoked with an unbeliever. To marry a man in hopes of making him a Christian, will be leading yourself into temptation. The advantages you speak of may doubtless be great blessings to you, if you are very certain you can enjoy them. You ought to be very explicit with the person, whoever he is, both with regard to your sentiments and his own heart. You cannot imagine the continual snares you will walk in, if you are joined to one, who is not joined to Christ; especially if you have any fondness for him. As in a married state there are more allurements to draw the mind from God than in a single one, so (if the companion be a Christian) there are also advantages in it, which perhaps may almost make the balance even. But how dreadful will it be, if he who should be your help, prove to you an occasion of falling? Above all things, my dear, try the sincerity of your own heart. Examine well whether you can accept this offer with a single eye to the glory of God, and the good of your own soul; and fear not, if you ask counsel of God in faith nothing wavering, that he will give you freedom of mind, either to accept or refuse as will be most profitable for you.
I do not wonder that your soul is at present distracted with worldly thoughts. An affair of this kind always occasions a thousand distractions, especially where it is in suspense. I fear your increase of company does not at all add to your spiritual happiness. The Lord Jesus bless you: I pity you. What need have we of continual assistance from above? How do we walk as on burning coals? O let us strive for that state of mind, in which we can say, nothing gives me pain but what is contrary to the will of God, and tends to draw my soul from him; and nothing gives me pleasure, but as it is agreeable to his will, and tends to draw my soul nearer to him. _Amen._
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_My dear Soul_,