_Of his death._
1. ON the 11th of _April_, 1649, he found himself very ill, and having concealed his sickness five days, was then constrained to take his bed. He endured great pains all over his body, with which his mind too was so much affected, that he profest, if God had not assisted him against the ravings of his imagination, he should have spoken more extravagancies than any madman. “There was much, he said, in such a condition to humble him. But it was the duty of a sinner to honour God, in all conditions wherein he should place him.”
2. During these great pains and torments, and during the whole course of his sickness, his ordinary employment consisted in affectionate elevations of his soul to God, in thoughts and words of blessing, praise, and submission to whatsoever was laid upon him, and of meekness and perfect obedience to all that attended, and had the care of him, with such a humble and contented spirit, that he thought all well done, though sometimes it was otherwise.
3. His patience never gave way to any complaint. And when his keeper, who was of the hospital of charity, with whom he had visited so many poor and sick, importuned him to declare his pain, *“O sister, said he, how does the love of God wipe away all pain? The servants of God suffer nothing.” Another friend asking, if his pain was not great? He answered, no. The other replied, “He thought it was.” “It is true, saith he, that I am much clogged with my disease; but I feel it not, because I do not think of it.”
4. Being urged to take some sweet things, he refused, saying, “These make little for life or for death.” Yet he refused not physic, but took it with a chearful countenance, though it was very bitter, and he had a great difficulty in swallowing. Indeed when one told him of another medicine which had done great cures, he answered, “Patience is a sovereign remedy,” intimating his unwillingness to try it. Yet when it was brought, he took it without any reluctance.
5. His sickness increasing more and more, yet he never called for any thing to refresh him: and when they had forced clean sheets upon his bed, and a pillow, which he had before refused, he said, “Lo! Here lies a gentleman at his ease.”
*6. Feeling some joy arise in him, upon the sight of a person of his acquaintance, with whom he had held a strict correspondence in spiritual things, who came out of the country on purpose to visit him: he immediately repeated thrice over, with great fervour, “I desire nothing more but God.”
7. Reflecting on the poor, the constant objects of his tenderest care, he said to his lady, “I recommend the poor to you. Will not you have a great care of them? You will perform it better than I. Fear nothing: what you give to them, will not lessen the rest.”
8. The greatest part of the first week of his illness, and some part of the second likewise, was spent by him in works of mercy, appointing of alms, and giving orders for letters to be writ into several provinces, about business of charity wherewith he stood charged, and whereof he gave an exact account.
9. Many persons of quality coming to visit him, he received them with much civility, but not without some concern, because most of those visits drew on discourse of worldly things. “They come hither, said he, to talk philosophy; of which I have no need.” And another time his expression was,
“A Christian should talk little.”
*10. A lady of great piety coming to visit him said, “Sir, I would with all my heart lay down my life to save yours.” He replied with a chearful look, and eyes lifted up to heaven, “To die is not to be lost. Our conversation and union will hereafter be more near and intimate.” She said, “But, Sir, if it pleased God to restore your health, and continue you longer with us; do not you desire it? St. _Martin_ desired to live upon these terms.” He answered, “O Madam, there is no comparison between a saint and a sinner! The will of God be done.”
11. The third day of his sickness he desired his director might be sent for. And being asked, if he found himself worse? He answered, “No; but in a business of this consequence, it is not safe to delay, for fear of a surprizal, the judgment and memory being both so subject to decay.” The next day he made his confession, the day after he confessed again, and almost every day till his death.