Soon after she had found redemption, I called, and saw her in full triumph of faith. O how unlike what she was at my last visit! _If any man is in Christ he is a new creature._ This is the work which despisers _will not believe, tho’ a man declare it unto them_. Her soul was passed from death unto life, an hidden, everlasting life in God. After we had prayed she witnessed a good confession. “I believe in Jesus Christ; I feel the truth of these words of his, _I am the resurrection and the life_. I have no fear, no doubt, no trouble. Your words were true: he has fulfilled his promise.”
*Never did I behold a soul so filled. Some of her words were, “Now indeed he has made me amends for my waiting. Blessed be God, all my pain is nothing; I have suffered nothing. I smell the sweet odour of the name of Jesus. His smell is as the smell of _Lebanon_. Who is so sweet as my Beloved? My Beloved is mine, and I am his. I love Jesus Christ with all my heart. I desire to be dissolved and to be with Christ. But his will be done. I have no will of my own.” While I was saying, “Doubt not, but be persuaded that neither life nor death, nor things present nor things――” She interrupted me with “No, no, I cannot doubt, altho’ I did doubt. I cannot fear now; perfect love hath cast out fear. I have full redemption in the blood of Jesus.”
*To her sisters she had said before I came, “Heaven is open! I see Jesus Christ with all his angels and saints in white. And I am joined to them. I shall never be parted more. I see what I cannot utter or express! Cannot you see Jesus Christ? There, there he stands, ready to receive you all. O do not doubt of the love of Jesus: look on me! If he has taken me into his bosom, who needs despair? Fear not, fear not. He is loving unto every man: _I believe Christ died for all_.”
Her first words, after I left her, were, “Liberty liberty! This is the glorious liberty of the sons of God! I know it, I see it, I feel it. Believe, believe there is such a liberty! And he will give it you. _I am sanctified wholly, spirit, soul and body._”
She had spent the time, while I was absent, in fervent prayer; and at my third visit told me, “I have whatsoever I ask. I have asked life for my mother and sisters, and have obtained it.” I took the opportunity, and put her upon praying for the peace of _Jerusalem_, for union, and for the preachers of reprobation, that God might open their eyes; for my brother, and for the lambs of this fold, that they might not be turned out of the way.
The fourth time I came to see her, they told me she had been in a great conflict; oftentimes repeating, “I will wrestle with thee for a blessing, I will not let thee go unless thou bless him. Bless that soul! Give him the thing I ask.” At last, she said, “Now I am more than conqueror. I have the petitions I ask. Not one is unanswered.”
To me, she said, “I have power with God, and with man, and have prevailed.”
From expounding at the _Malt-room_, I returned the last time, and found her ready for the Bridegroom. Her every word was full of power, and life, and love. It was the Spirit of her Father which spoke in her. She had been wrestling again, and making intercession for the saints, and all mankind; particularly our own church and nation. Some of her words were, “Thy judgments are abroad in the earth; O that the inhabitants of this land may learn righteousness! Grant me, sweet Jesus, that they may repent and live.” She prayed fervently for the society, that they might abide in the word, keep close together, and be all of one heart and mind. There is a curse upon them, (said she) a curse of unthankfulness; but I have prayed my dear Lord to remove it, and he will remove it.”
When one of her sisters came to see her, who was deeply mourning for Christ, she laboured much to comfort her, bad her look at her, so miserable and hopeless an unbeliever lately; and assured her the Comforter should quickly come. At the sight of her sister’s tears, O how sweetly did she lament over her! I never saw such sympathy! The spirit in her mourned like a turtle-dove, and made intercession with groanings that cannot be uttered.
*All the time of her sickness, she never once complained, or shewed the least sensibility of pain, or that she had any body at all. When one asked her if she did not feel her pains, being then in strong convulsions, she answered, “My pain is great, but I do not feel it. It does not trouble me. I chuse it rather than ease; for my Lord chuses it. Pain or ease, life or death, ’tis all one. The Spirit beareth witness with my spirit, that I am a child of God: I have the earnest of mine inheritance in my heart. I have no will. I am made perfect in love.”
I asked, whether that peace which she tasted above a year ago, was the same she now enjoyed? She answered, “It was of the same kind, in the lowest or first degree. It surely was justification.”