I SINCERELY rejoice, to find you are convinced of a most important, but self-abasing truth, that you are _yourself_ utterly unable to work out your own salvation, or to form so much as one good thought, or one desire towards it. Rest not in this conviction, but seek, ask, knock: and you shall assuredly obtain that faith which is the gift of God. Give me leave to repeat, that religion consists, first, in a true knowledge of our want of Christ: Secondly, in knowing him to be not only the Saviour of the world, but _our_ Saviour in particular; in knowing him to have died for _us_, that we might live through _him_. There is a great difference between this scheme of religion, and that we form to ourselves when we begin to desire eternal happiness. I then thought I must refrain from evil works, and be constant at church. And I should doubtless go to heaven, though I walked not in a narrow, but much frequented way. I saw not that Christ alone was the way to heaven; but though I could not but see my works were insufficient, yet I hoped God would accept this patch-work obedience, and supply what was wanting. Beware of building _your_ hopes on this sandy foundation. Seek, but seek forgiveness and acceptance with God, through him who is the rock of ages. Let him not go until he bless you. For there is no safety but in his friendship, and no peace but in his favour.
May every blessing attend my dear friend. Wherever her abode is, she has a place in my heart.
* * * * *
_November 9._
*DON’T you think me cruel, that I can rejoice to see you under the cross? I believe both our souls would wither, did not the rough wind rise to blow away the dust from our branches. When this is done, how salutary is the rain of grace, how refreshing the beams of love! I am persuaded there is not one tree of the Lord’s planting, but must be purged, that it may bring forth much fruit. If you have been on the mount with _Peter_, _James_, and _John_, remember that was not the only proof our Lord gave them of his peculiar love: they, and they only were admitted to _Gethsemane_. Think on this, my dear friend, when you are under the cross, and wonder at the grace that calls, and that enables you to drink of that cup, and to have some fellowship with Christ in his sufferings. I believe your heart and mine have said,
“No cross, no suffering I decline: Only let all my heart be thine.”
This was recorded in the courts above, and is answered as we are able to bear. Look not so much at the trial, as at the grace which keeps you from sinking under it. You may be greatly oppressed: but omnipotence shall undertake for you. The enemy may thrust sore at you that you may fall: but claim _his_ help who can and will deliver you. The floods of temptation may seem ready to overflow your soul. _But the Lord sitteth above the water-floods, and remaineth a King for ever. He shall give strength to his people; the Lord shall give his people the blessing of peace._ Fear not then, thou worm in thine own eyes. Since thou hast been precious, being bought with blood, thou art fair in his sight, who yet is of purer eyes than to behold iniquity. Therefore he sits as a refiner’s fire, and as fuller’s soap, on the souls of his people.
I feel Jesus near: he is better to me than I could ask or think. May your spirit find him nigh at this hour, and to the end of your warfare!
* * * * *
_London._
*YOUR letter came in an acceptable time: I feared you would not write so soon, and the thought pained me. I found such union of heart with you last week, as it is pleasing pain to experience. I looked upon your’s as an answer to prayer. The Lord generally causes me to ask for a letter before it comes: how shall I speak his praise? He is indeed Immanuel: and what can we ask more? That we may each moment feel his power in our hearts, and testify to all, that God is with us. But what are we, that God should dwell on earth! I am lost in the enquiry. And will God make a sinner happy? Or what is the same thing, will he make us holy? He will, our hearts cry out, he will! We shall be filled with the fulness of his love. He knows I pant, I thirst to prove this, to know more fully the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ: the Lord lets me drink of the brook in the way, before I reach the fountain-head. And I feel love to you, such love as only friendship knows, animated by the love of God.
I am better in body, but I believe the days of my appointed time are short. O blessed prospect beyond the grave! There I shall see him face to face! Help me by your prayers to keep the bright prize in view, that I may be ever running toward the mark. Jesus direct us to aim aright, and keep us from swerving aside into crooked paths!