Though he had revived, so as to be able to travel thus far, yet he manifested no expectation of recovery: he supposed as his physician did, that his being brought so near to death at Boston, was owing to the breaking of ulcers in his lungs. He told me that he had had several such ill turns before, only not to so high a degree, but as he supposed owing to the same cause; and that he was brought lower and lower every time; and it appeared to him, that in his last sickness (in Boston) he was brought as low as possible, and yet alive; and that he had not the least expectation of surviving the next return of this breaking of ulcers; but still appeared perfectly calm.
On Wednesday morning, the week after he came to Northampton, he took leave of his brother Israel, never expecting to see him again in this world.
When Mr. Brainerd came hither, he had so much strength as to be able, from day to day, to ride out two or three miles, and to return; and sometimes to pray in the family; but from this time he sensibly decayed, and became weaker and weaker.
*While he was here, his conversation from first to last was much on the same subjects as it had been in Boston. He was much in speaking of the nature of _true religion_, as distinguished from its various _counterfeits_; expressing his great concern, that the latter did so much prevail in so many places. He often manifested his great abhorrence of all such _doctrines_ and _principles_, as in any wise savoured of, and had any (though but a remote) tendency to Antinomianism; of all such notions as seemed to diminish the necessity of holiness of life, or to abate men’s regard to the commands of God, and a strict, diligent, and universal practice of virtue, under a pretence of depreciating our works, and magnifying God’s free grace. He spake often with much detestation, of such discoveries and joys as have nothing of the nature of _sanctification_ in them, and do not tend to strictness, tenderness, and diligence in religion, and meekness and benevolence toward mankind: and he also declared, that he looked on such pretended _humility_ as worthy of no regard, that was not manifested by _modesty_ of _conduct_ and _conversation_.
*After he came hither, as long as he lived, he was much in speaking of the future prosperity of Zion that is so often promised in scripture: and his mind seemed to be carried forth with intense desires, that religion might speedily revive and flourish; yea, the nearer death advanced, still the more did his mind seem to be taken up with this subject. He told me, when near his end, that “he never in all his life had his mind so led forth in desires and earnest prayers for the flourishing of _Christ’s kingdom_ on earth, as since he was brought so exceeding low at Boston.” He seemed much to wonder, that there appeared no more of a disposition in ministers and people to pray for the flourishing of religion through the world; that so little a part of their prayers was generally taken up about it, in their families, and elsewhere; and particularly, he several times expressed his wonder, that there appeared no more forwardness to comply with the _proposal_ lately made in a memorial from a number of ministers in Scotland, and sent over into America, for _united extraordinary prayer_, among Christ’s ministers and people, for the _coming of Christ’s kingdom_: and he sent as his dying advice to _his own congregation_, that they should practise agreeably to that proposal.¹
¹ His congregation, since this, have with great chearfulness and unanimity fallen in with this advice, and have practised agreeably to the proposal from Scotland; and have at times appeared with uncommon engagedness and fervency of spirit in their united devotions, pursuant to that proposal. Also the presbyteries of New-York, and New-Brunswick, since this, have with one consent, fallen in with the proposal, as likewise some others of God’s people in those parts.
*Though he was exceeding weak, yet there appeared in him a continual care well to employ time, and fill it up with something that might be profitable; either profitable conversation, or writing letters to absent friends, or noting something in his diary, or looking over his former writings, correcting them, and preparing them to be left in the hands of others at his death, or giving some directions concerning a future management of his people, or employment in secret devotions. He seemed never to be easy, however ill, if he was not doing something for God, or in his service.